A Father and his Son
by sydsyd1134
Summary: A/U Bardock has escaped Frieza's blast and journyed to Earth. There he find's Kakarot or soon to be called Goku. Follow the the duo on their adventures for the dragonballs and defeating alien foes
1. Prolouge Pt 1

I do not own any characters from Dragonball or Dragonball Z. They all belong to Akira Toriyama.

Bardock was exhausted, it had seemed easy for him to fly through the blockade of Frieza's men, but it had taken a lot of his power to do so. Blood from the wound on his head streamed down his armor. "This is the end Frieza! Do you hear me? The end!' He said as he felt himself grow weaker.

'Is that so? You monkey, there is a reason that even the mightiest of warriors fear and obey me! Don't fool yourself, you don't stand a chance!' shouted Frieza.

Frieza held up his index finger, a small ball of light was on it. _'Oh crap, I know what that it is. Frieza's signature final attack, the Death Ball! They say it can blow up entire planets. I have to get out of here before he kills me!'_ Bardock flew back to planet Vegeta-sei; home world of the mighty warrior race the sayains. Slowly Frieza's Death Ball grew; Bardock landed at the pod launching pad.

He ran towards a big pod at his left and a pink-skinned alien tried to stop him from entering the ship but he never got the chance as Bardock knocked him out with an elbow strike. Bardock opened one of pods and hopped in; he closed it again and pressed a few buttons, activating the pod. _'Bardock was looking at himself or at least he thought so, until he realized it was his son. The young sayain stood in front of his brother, Raditz.' Kakarot!' Growled Raditz. 'My name is Goku and I'm from earth!' replied his younger brother. _

Bardock snapped out of his vision. The voice from the computer asked: **Destination? **

Bardock cleared his throat and replied, "Planet Earth. Land me nearest where sayain Kakarot may have landed."

**"Understood. Estimated arrival time: 1 week and 4 hours."** The machine told him. Bardock grunted. He turned and gasped in shock; a gigantic ball of energy was blowing up Vegeta-sei. He could see Frieza laughing manically. _"Damn you Frieza! I may not have defeated you or will I ever dream to; but I swear I will make my visions come true. You will have the honor of being killed by my son Kakarot!' _Bardock vowed.

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Bardock's space pod arrived at its destination, Earth after a journey of several days. The space pod crashed into a forest after flying through the atmosphere of the planet. The pod was drilled deep into the soft soil of the forest, de-rooting several trees in the process. Bardock stepped out of the pod coolly; his armor was tattered, his wounds were moderately healed, and he was covered in dry blood and old bruises. He stretched in aching joints and cracked his neck. Man did that fell awesome. He wandered though the forest and a small smile came a across his face.

It was another space pod; it looked tattered and burned. He stumbled near the pod and kicked the pod's door, making it open. Bardock's face split into a rare big grin, inside the pod was a wailing baby boy with the same hair-style as him and a little furry brown tail. He had just found his youngest son, Kakarot. Bardock gently reached in and picked up the trashing, weeping little boy. He cradled him in is muscular arms, trying not to hurt the boy. Bardock was still sore from his battle he laid down near a giant ancient tree. Kakarot still crying, Bardock cooed, "There there, I'm here now. Daddy's here. It's alright, it's ok. I promise I won't let anything happen to you. Hush now son, don't cry."

Kakarot finally stopped crying. He was now cuddling up to Bardock's chest fast asleep; sucking on his fist. Bardock sighed in relief. _'It's about damn time you quieted down. But like I said, I'll always protect you. And one day, you'll become stronger than me and become a true warrior. I'll make sure I'll train you to defeat Frieza.' _Bardock laid his eyes against the tree's trunk and fell into the darkness of sleep.


	2. Prolouge Pt 2

I do not own any characters from Dragonball or Dragonball Z. They all belong to Akira Toriyama.

"_Hello? Hello, are you awake son? Can you hear __me?"_ An old faint voice beckoned. Bardock groaned as he opened his eyes slowly; his vision was a bit blurry and so was last night. Bardock rubbed his eyes and saw a clearer image; an old man with a kind looking wrinkled face was holding a struggling Kakarot and was trying to see if he was alright. The man smiled weakly "What a relief. I was taking my morning walk today and I saw you and you son out here in the wild. I see you're injured; I advise to know it's dangerous out here for a wounded man his infant child." The he started a small lecture. Bardock rolled his eyes a bit. The old man held out his hand and said, "My name is Gohan. You can call me Grandpa Gohan. Who are you and why are you out here hurt so badly with only your son?"

Bardock took the Gohan's hand and steadily got up. Bardock brushed of any dirt from his armor and pants; he took Kakarot from Gohan and placed him on his shoulder; then he wrapped his drooping tail around his waist. "I'm Bardock. Thank you for looking after my son while I was asleep. The reason I'm out here was I was searching for my son Kakarot here and last night I found him. The reason I'm injured was I was trying to rebel against an evil tyrant who ruled my people," Bardock sighed gloomily, "I miserably failed. The tyrant ended up blowing up my people. My son Kakarot and I are probably the last 2 survivors as far as I know. My comrades…were murdered by his one of his right hand men's lackeys."

Gohan's wrinkly face became gloomy as well. "I am so sorry, I had no idea." He said.

"It's not your fault. I came here to find my son and to train his to defeat the tyrant," Bardock said proudly.

The old man's face then brightened up, "I may not look it, but I'm a martial arts master. Why don't you and you son come live with me Bardock? You don't look like you have that much money and we need to fix up those wounds."

Bardock and smiled and said, "Thank you, I accept your offer. Thank you Gohan."

Gohan chuckled, "Please call me Grandpa. By the way…what was your son's name I again? I'm an old man with a bad memory."

"He's name is Kakarot.'"

"Kakarot…what an odd name. If I was his father, I'd name him Goku!"Gohan implied.

"You can call him Goku, but I'll call him Kakarot." Bardock growled.

"Fine, fine; after all he is your son." Gohan said.

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Soon Bardock found himself following Gohan to his house. On the Goku began to explore his father's face. He was moving around annoyingly; touching every feature of Bardock's face. His tail tickled Bardock's nose; he pulled at Bardock's identical black hair; and he kept on switching shoulder in sit on. Bardock was greatly annoyed just about when he was to scold the child; Goku gently touched his father's scar in his cheek. Bardock was silent as he continued his way behind Gohan. Goku gently and innocently traced the scar with his tiny baby hands; he gave his dad an adorable puzzling look.

Bardock said softly, "I got that on my first mission, when I was about 3 years old. It during my oozaru transformation, a solider gave me this. I've had this ever since." Goku gave him a look of sympathy; then to Bardock great surprise, Goku gently gave a baby kiss on the scar and sat on his shoulder with his tiny hand still on the scar. Bardock and Goku were silent during the entire trip.

Gohan's house was a small cabin with a little shrine near it. Bardock didn't know, but he never felt at home in his life at Gohan's house. Gohan dressed his wounds and gave him a bed with a warm blanket and soft pillow. He gave Goku a crib made from sheet, pillows, and blankets. After a few weeks, Bardock was as good as new. Gohan gave him a fresh Earth clothes and Goku fresh baby clothes. Bardock and Goku now had a home on Planet Earth.

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A year passed since Bardock and Kakarot stayed with Gohan. Goku at first for Gohan, he was wild and didn't want to have anything to do with is kindness. When Bardock stepped in after training, cutting some wood for winter, or fishing, Goku was a little angel. Once day, Gohan suggested that they should go a stroll near the waterfall. Gohan placed Goku was in a basket strapped to his back while Bardock walked in front.

"Why do have to. What do we have to gain from just walking around?" Bardock asked impatiently near a giant gorge with a waterfall.

"You have much to learn about life son. Life is more than just training or eating or overworking yourself. You need to take time and enjoy yourself and others and enjoy the world." Gohan said wisely. Bardock just grunted in response.

Then they went past a small tree that bared only three grape fruits over the gorge; Goku was hungry and tried to reach from his basket to get it. Goku then reached so far from his basket and fell. He screamed "DADDY!!!!"

Bardock heard his son's screams and quickly on instinct jumped the gorge after him. Gohan screamed him to stop as Bardock reached out for his son. Goku tried to grasp Bardock's hand, but it was too late. Goku had crashed his head on a big boulder. Spurts of blood came as Bardock grabbed the unconscious toddler in his arms and fell into the water.

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Goku was in a comma for 5 weeks. The little boy had to wear bandages on his head for 3 weeks, soon developed an unseen scar on his head, covered by his wild black hair. Bardock had cancelled all his training lessons with Gohan to watch over his son. He was waiting for Goku to wake up; worried to death. He stroked his son's hair and traced his finger over the unseen scar. _'Looks like we both have scars eh son? I vowed to protect you and I failed. Your mother would be scolding me senseless right now. I hope you can forgive me Kakarot…Please wake up.' _He mused.

SuddenlyGoku's eyes started twitching. Bardock peered over, tower the bed with excitement and anxiousness. Goku slowly opened his eyes like a newborn infant. Bardock smiled and simply said, "Good morning son, you lazy bum."

Goku tilted his head in puzzlement for a moment, then have a big goofy grin and blurted cheerfully, "Daddy!"

Bardock was taken aback by awe and shock. That grin and tone in his voice, was so…so un-sayain like. It was like he was a whole different person now. Bardock shook it off; he was glad his son was alive. Goku jumped out of bed and hugged Bardock in a giggling fit. Bardock hugged him back and patted his son's head. He whispered in his son's ear, "I love you…Goku…"

That name now registered in his head, Goku was never was never the same again. He was cheerful and happy and awfully smiley. Bardock often wondered if the accident had anything to do with this. But he shook it off. He now enjoyed reading the newspaper with his son on his lap playing with his building blocks on the table while Bardock drinks his coffee. Life on Earth was peaceful, and he liked it that way.


	3. Secret of the Dragonballs

I do not own any characters from Dragonball or Dragonball Z. They all belong to Akira Toriyama.

Years passed by and so did a lot of changes. Gohan had passed away, leaving his most precious secret treasure with Bardock and Goku. His final words were: "Bardock, Goku…even though his old body may pass away, my spirit will live on with you both. So enjoy the mountains as always; miss me not. Goku play as always just as if I am still here waiting up for you on the hillside with your father; because I still am." Those were is final words. Bardock had learned so much about true life and the meaning of happiness from Gohan, and his son; he thought of Gohan as the dad he always wanted. Goku consider Gohan as his real grandpa. He left an orange orb with 4 red stars on it, that's where our story begins.

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Young Goku was rolling home on a giant freshly cut down log tree. He had his long ax over his shoulder with a goofy grin on his face and his tail high in the air. A monkey in a nearby tree waved to him. He cheerily said, "Hi! Nice day isn't it?" to the monkey. When he got to a large hill, he increased his speed and log rolled down the hill. He stopped when he came across his cabin home. Goku did some warm-ups and then he picked up the giant log. He threw it up high into the air and jumped after the falling log. With one punch he destroyed the log and sent it into a nice neat pile of fire wood. "Chores and morning training are done!" Goku sang to himself.

Goku ran to the back of his house and saw his father training with a beat-up and worn out punching bag. "Dad, I'm done with getting the fire wood and my morning training!" He called. Bardock stopped and turned to his son. He took a towel and wiped the sweat from his face.

"Alright Goku, go to the river and catch us some lunch. I'm starving!" He whined grasping this hungry belly. Goku grabbed his stomach to in pain of hunger. A loud grumble came from the both of them.

'You don't have to tell me twice Dad!" Goku smiled. Bardock smiled and tousled Goku hair and sent Goku off. He shook his head, that boy was something else. He sighed and continued his morning work-out.

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Unknowing to the two hungry mountain warriors, a mysterious stranger was heading their way. They hadn't have a clue that their life was soon to begin a radical new phase; totally radical. A car was driving near the mountain side inside was this stranger. It stopped out came a girl looking about 16; she had blue hair tied into a messy ponytail and bright blue eyes. She wore a pink dress with the words _**BULMA **_on it. She had a little pouch and sneakers on as well. She was completely alien to this scenery.

She stared out to the forest and took a deep breath of fresh mountain air. She went into her pouch and took out a small looking round machine. She clicked it and said, "Yep, my radar is right. There's a Dragonball somewhere near here. She went back into her small car and drove off.

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"I've gotta get some food in me, and for Dad!" he groaned as he strapped his power pole on his back. He was in the living room he walked over to a small orange orb with four red stars on it lying on a pillow. He bowed to it and said to the orb as if a person, "Grandpa, please bring me luck." Then he started to head out. Suddenly the orb started to glow; Goku stopped and stared the orb. "Grandpa I know you are always watching over me, but please don't worry. I've always had my Dad to protect me!" He turned and waved, "Well I'm off to catch some fish! I'll talk to you later Grandpa" Then he headed off to the forest.

Goku looked around in the deep forest looking for the river. Some sunlight was seeping through the thick trees. "Now where's that river trail? I thought it was here somewhere." He asked himself. 'Oh, I remember where!" Goku soon ran through the forest trail, searching for the river. He did occasional jumps and flips for fun. He swings from tree to tree with the grace of a monkey; until he finally found the river.

Goku then took a snack break. He was hanging possum style by his tail while munching on an apple. His father would always yell at him when he used his tail for such things. He told him it disrespected his tail, and his people. Goku had a short attention span for he never remembered he was not allowed to do this. Goku got up and sat on the branch and finished his apple. "That's the end of my snack!" he said and threw the apple behind him.

The apple landed and bonked a saber-toothed tiger on the head. The tiger growled and looked up, he saw Goku eating another apple with his tail swinging happily. The tiger was anger and growled loudly. Goku looked down and saw the tiger that was ready to pounce. It did pounce high; trying to get the little boy. Goku remained unfazed as the tiger was only a few inches away from his face. Goku then used his tail to flip under the branch of the tree; letting the tiger hit the ground while Goku remained safe. He jumped off the tree and began running from the angry tiger; still with a smile on his face.

The tiger roared loudly as he chased the boy. Goku wasn't scared at all by the tiger; actually he thought this was fun. He looked back and giggled at the fuming tiger. The tiger was gaining up and then Goku started to panic a little. "Hey, can't you find your breakfast somewhere else?" He asked still running for his life. Then he disappeared from the tiger's sight; the tiger found himself in midair. He looked down and his eyes bugged. Goku was leading him off a cliff. The tiger fell into the river lying below while Goku was hanging on a branch near off the cliff.

Goku giggled at his small victory when suddenly the branch broke. Goku was falling down the cliff screaming, "DADDY!!!" He landed into the river; he stuck out his wet face and said "Time to find some lunch!" Goku got back to dry land and took off his seeping wet gi. In nothing but his underwear, he dipped his tail into the water. He wiggled it called out to the fish, "Come out fishes, I know you think it's a great big worm!"

Fish started to gather around the tail. Bardock had taught Goku this trick when they went fishing together. He pulled it up a little just in case. A giant shadow in the water was going near the tail. Goku didn't seem to notice. It was a giant fish with sharp teeth. The big fish then tried come up and bite the tail; but Goku pulled it up to quickly. The fish was out of the water; Goku jumped and gave the fish a hard kick, killing it. Goku dove after the sinking fish and pulled it up.

Goku then in his dry gi, walked back home dragging a giant fish on his back. "Well, this one outta last me and Dad until dinnertime." He said to himself. Suddenly he heard a loud strange sound. Goku looked back and asked "Huh? What's that sound?" Quickly from behind a strange machine was driving into Goku's way fast. Goku never seeing a car before panicked, the girl saw Goku and screamed. The girl tried to stop the car but knocked Goku and the fish off into a tree.

The girl closed he eyes and said, 'I…just hit a 6 foot fish!" She had obviously had not notice Goku there. She opened her eyes from the impact. "Huh?" she said. Behind the fish was a little boy. Goku was completely confused. He was in shock as he slowly stepped away from the fish. The girl yelled to Goku, 'Hey what're you doing. I've could've killed you!"

Goku growled, "Get me from behind will yah? I don't know what kind of monster you are, but I'm gonna make you come out of your shell!" Goku then used his amazing strength and lifted up the car. The girl was completely freaked out. The car was too heavy for Goku, so it made it difficult. "You're a lot heavier than you look monster!" he grumbled. The he threw the car and landed on its side. A tire flew out and the sound of breaking metal and glass was heard. Goku pulled out his pole and announced, "Just because you're a big monster doesn't mean I'm just gonna take my fish!"

'Wait a second! I'm not a monster," the girl said in a panic, "I'm a human being!"

Goku was getting ready to attack, until he heard the girl's pleas. "Huh…human?" he asked.

"Yeah I'm human." The girl said as she crawled out of the car from the window. She landed in front of the boy; still not trusting this person he stepped back in defense position. 'I'm human just like you. Honest I swear." She said raising her hand in surrender.

Goku growled and stepped back every time the girl made a step closer. "Stay right there!" he ordered, "Don't you make a move." He started to inspect the girl poking places with his pole. When got from behind and looked down and up from the girl. He moved around her back side.

The girl getting annoyed asked, "And just what are you looking for?"

"I don't trust you!" Goku snapped. "I'm not sure what it is yet, but you sure look kind of different to me."

The girl smiled and replied, "That's because I'm a girl."

Goku gave a puzzled expression. He said in surprise, "A what? I've never met a girl before."

The girl was too in shock. "Are you for real? A female, as in not a boy." She said annoyingly.

Goku dropped his defensive pose and replied "My grandpa and dad both told me about girls, but I've never actually seen one." The girl was confused. "Yeah, my grandpa passed away a few years ago, so it's just me and my dad. But grandpa always told me if I ever met one of you girl I have to be as pleasant as possible."

The girl giggled and gave a cute look and said, "He did, did he? Well that's a great suggestion. Be nice if all boys were like that, wouldn't it!"

Goku then sneaked over behind the girl and look at her backside. He peeked under her skirt and said curiously, "Huh…that's really strange…" He used is pole and flipped he skirt up.

The girl snapped at him, "Hey what the hell do you think you're doing?"

Goku gave her an innocent look and replied, 'I was just checking to see if you had a tail."

The girl dropped her anger and paused for a moment. She had just noticed that this little boy had a wiggling tail behind him. She bended over to check it out. "Dad says all the girls he met had tails. My late Auntie Fasha and my late mother had one. Don't worry; maybe it takes girl longer to grow one." Goku said.

The girl giggle and sarcastically said, "Heh, I'm sure it will sprout out any second now. _'What a weirdo.' _She mused.

"So, tell me how'd you catch this noisy monster anyway?" Goku asked casually.

"Relax kid, it's not a monster. It's just a car." She replied idly.

Goku jumped on the car and said, "Alright, you probably know what're you're talking about. But it sure looks like a monster to me." He stomped his small foot on it a few times.

"Yah know, you seem awfully strong for such a strong kid." She added.

Goku turned and smiled, "Yeah my grandpa trained to be like steel. My dad is training me too. My dad wants me to become the strongest man in the universe; so I can defeat a mean tyrant who destroyed the rest of my people."

The girl stopped. "Your dad wants you beat a-a tyrant? There was a civilization full of tailed people?"

"Well dad tells me our people were a people or war and warriors. We were honorable and strong. He told me the king was tricked into giving his empire to an evil tyrant. We had to conquer lands in his name. My family was low-class. One day when I was a baby, my dad found out the tyrant was going to blow up my people their home. Dad tried to stop him but failed, as a result dad got away and our people were killed. I don't remember anything about my old home, not my mother or my big brother." He explained.

She gasped 'Y-you have a big brother?"

Goku scratched his head and said, "Well I don't remember him. I think he's dead.' He seemed unfazed by talking about this tragedy he cannot remember. 'Hey since you came here in this big car, does that mean you live in a big city with a bunch of other people?" he asked. The girl nodded. Goku jumped down. 'Well, it's nothing fancy why don't you come with me and see where I live. You can meet my dad!" he offered. Goku ran in front and grabbed his fish over his shoulder. "Come on follow me! I'm sure dad would love to meet you!" and he walked on.

"Alright but wait a minute kid." The girl said. She reached into her pouch again and pulled out her radar. She clicked it and saw the bleeping yellow dot pointing her way. _'Hmm…The Dragonball might even be at this kid's house' _she thought. 'Sure wouldn't hurt to follow him and investigate." She said quietly. "Hey what're you got there? You gonna eat the whole thing?" she asked.

Goku smiled and politely replied, "No, this is for me and Dad. Why not join us for lunch? It looks like you could use a few pounds."

She put back her radar in her pouch and snapped, "Excuse me, what do you mean what do you mean by that wisecrack?"

"W-well you're a lot skinnier than me and Dad." He simply said.

She blushed and said, "Well that's true." _'Of course this kid's built like an ox. So probably the father is too. But I'll still take it as a compliment.' _She mused. She gave Goku a sweet smirk.

Goku was confused. _'Oh boy; Dad was right, girls sure are weird.'_ He thought. "Well come one let's get going! I want you to meet my dad!" he said cheerfully. Goku turned around and dragged the fish behind him. The girl followed.

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Bardock was home still training. He was getting bit worried about Goku. He was never this late, especially for lunchtime. _'Maybe I should've gone with Kakarot.'_ He thought. He shook it off, Kakarot was a big boy. He needed to learn how to look after himself. He sighed and went on to weight lifting.

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Goku and the girl continued their way to Goku's house. The girl was walking besides Goku. "By the way, I didn't catch your name. She said.

Goku replied, 'Well my birth name is Son Kakarot." She tilted her head in puzzlement. "But you can call me Son Goku. Grandpa says it means savior of light."

Bulma said quietly, "Wanna know my name?"

"Yeah!" he cheered.

"My name is Bulma Briefs." There was a pregnant pause between them.

Goku broke into laughter. "Hahaha! Bulma!"

"Yeah my name is Bulma. What's so funny about that?" she snapped.

'It's just a whole lot sillier sounding than my real name Kakarot!" he giggled. He started to sing tauntingly "Bulma, Bulma, and Bulma! ~

Bulma huffed, 'Stop that right now! You think your name sounds a lot better! Kakarot sounds just like carrot, and Goku sounds just like Goku!"

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Soon the pair got to Goku's house. "Wait here a second, let me just tell Dad you're here." Goku said. He dropped the fish in front of the door and went inside. Bulma pressed her ear against the door; she heard Goku's voice and a more mature sounding man's voice inside.

"Dad I'm home and I brought lunch!"

"Excellent! I was worried about you. You took too long young man, what happened?"

'Well I was going back home with lunch until this car came and almost hit me! Inside this car thingy was a girl from those big cities.

"A girl? From the city? Where is she?"

"She's outside Dad. I want you to meet her." Soon Bulma stepped back little and put on a cheesy grin. Out came Goku and another man. She made a small gasp when she saw him. He was very big and very muscular. She could see the family resemblance between them because of their face, hair style, eyes, and nose. He had a scowl on his face and what intrigued Bulma more was the big scar on his cheek. He had a blood red headband tied around his head.

"Who are girl? Why are so far away from home. We don't get many city folk like you around these mountains." He asked sternly.

"U-um I-I'm Bulma sir. I came here looking for something. I'm sorry I almost hurt you son." She said nervously. He was very big and strong looking. If the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, she was afraid he was even stronger than Goku. He was meaner looking than the cheerful boy. She noticed the brown furry thing around his waist. She made a small gasp when she saw it unravel into a wagging tail, just like Goku's.

"Well I forgive you for that, Goku tough that way. Please forgive my son for his curiosity and if any damage he's done. He quite doesn't know his own strength yet. Why don't you come inside had join us for lunch." He said. "The name is Son Bardock.

"Err…thanks Bardock." Bulma said awkwardly as she followed the Sons inside the house. She was surprised on how Bardock's mood and tone changed.

Goku was the first to follow and pointed out to his father; the orb was glowing, "Daddy, look! Listen!"

Bardock nodded and kneeled next to him. "Listen to what?" Bulma asked.

Goku and Bardock not taking their eyes off the mystic orb, Goku explained, 'Whenever the orb starts to glow it mean Grandpa is trying to tell us something.

"It's his way of communicating…" Bardock grunted.

"But I don't hear anything." Bulma complained. She peered over Goku's shoulder and saw the glowing orb. She pointed and exclaimed, 'Oh my goodness it a Dragonball!!"

Bardock and Goku looked at her with puzzled looks. She pushed Goku out of her way; Bardock caught him and glared at the girl. Bulma picked up the or in her hands, with sparkles in her eyes. Goku got out of his father's arms and started to pull at Bulma whining, "Come on there! Give Grandpa back to us!"

"Yeah girl, listen to my son. Give Gohan back!" Bardock said.

Bulma gave the two a confused look, "You both think…this is your grandfather?"

"Yeah," They chorused. Goku swiped the Dragonball from Bulma's hands. "It's something my Grandpa gave to us before he died and I don't and we really don't want you to break it!" Goku explained sternly.

'This ball is very valuable to us girl." Bardock said.

"See how it shines. That must mean that grandpa is trying to tell us something." Goku said dreamily.

"It's never done that before." Bardock added.

"Well I supposed I could show you both something," Bulma said while reaching into her pouch. She took out 2 orange orbs exactly like the Son's; each with stars on it. "Hah!"

"What! That's impossible! You must've gotten those from Gohan!" Bardock exclaimed.

"No I didn't. I found them! They're called Dragonballs!" Bulma explained. Goku and Bardock stared down at the four starred ball in Goku's hands.

"Dragonballs…" They said together confused.

"That's right you two. They're supposed to be seven of them in all and yours was just reacting to the two I found." Bulma said as she placed her two Dragonballs on the table. "Here set them on the table"

"Ok…"Goku said. He placed his Grandpa Ball on the table next to Bulma's Dragonballs. Bardock stood next to him, looking with interest. He's eyes widened as the 3 balls began to glow in perfect harmony.

"Pretty wild...huh?" Bulma said in a daze.

"Yeah," The two males chorused in a daze as well.

"You guys won't believe this but these things are totally magical!" she turned and looked at them. Bardock was nearing with interest. "If these ever fall into the wrong hands it could mean the end of as you and I know it!"

"Whoa…" Bardock murmured as he stared at the little orbs. Goku picked up and stared at his grandpa ball.

"No way Bulma! Really?" Goku asked.

She nodded "Absolutely!" The two Sons just hmmed.

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Meanwhile, two doors were opened. The light shone an orange Dragonball lying on a pillow. Three people, a short blue man, a medium size fox dog thing man, and a tall pretty woman stepped in. "There it is!" the short blue man said. "There is the magic ball!"

The trio walked passed suits of armor holding axes. The short blue man climbed the steps and grabbed the ball. 'Ah! Yes, the Dragonball is finally in my hands!" he exclaimed. Suddenly a suit of armor fell on him; he screamed and looked at the empty old suit or armor. He pushed it away. A skull came out of it and out of the skull came bats. "Uh…ahem…well anyway I want to make my wish now!" the blue man said.

"Sir," The woman interrupted.

'What!" the blue man snapped.

"It's not as easy as you think sir. You have one Dragonball, yes, but it's worthless without the rest of them." She said idly.

"WHAT!?!" The blue man gasped.

"There are seven Dragonballs sir. We must unite all seven of them before their powerful magic is unleashed.

"Oh boy, all that searching."

"But just imagine, that glorious day when the seven balls are finally brought together…on that day it is said the sky will grow dark and a great energy will emerge and pulsate until it is channeled into the Dragonballs and released into the sky! Then, the eternal dragon that's very breath is like the fire who stokes for the earth appears from his subterranean lair all for one purpose, to granting you one wish! Whatever you want the most."

The man looked dreamy. He could see it now; people bowing down to him. A huge palace. Horns playing and people cheering. The blue man, the ruler of the world! The man chuckled wildly.

"Emperor, are you ok?" the woman asked.

"Of course I'm okay! Soon I will rule the world! He chuckled madly. He stared right into the Dragonball

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Goku stared deeply into the ball in his hand sitting on his father's shoulder. "Wow…" was all he could say.

"So let me get this straight. Whoever gathers all seven ball together will be able to make one wish come true!" Bardock asked.

"Yeah, the last time the wish was granted, some guy became king!" Bulma replied. "But all the rest of these things are scattered all over the Earth because that happened a long time ago."

The two stared into the ball again. "And…You've got two already?" Bardock asked.

"Yeah, pretty cool huh? Now I've gotta find the rest of them before that crazy emperor does."

"Emperor?" Bardock asked quietly.

"And what're gonna do when you find them Bulma?' Goku asked excitedly, bouncing on his father shoulder slightly.

Bulma got up and said "I'd like to…well I don't I should tell you both now. But believe me; I have a very special wish. It's just about the dreamiest thing a girl could every want!" she squealed. She turned to the Sons and asked, "So it would be great if you both let me use your Dragonball."

Goku pulled back the ball to his chest and jumped behind Bardock's head. "Are you nuts? Grandpa gave us this to remember him by!" Goku snapped. Bardock grunted in agreement.

"How about this you two, I'll take a picture of your grandpa's Dragonball and can both use that to remember him by!" Bulma offered.

Goku gave her a raspberry. "No!" Goku snapped.

"Come now son, you're being childish…" Bardock soothed.

Bulma gave them a big cheesy grin and said sweetly, "Okay, keep your Dragonball. It really doesn't matter!" They both gave her puzzled looks. "Yah know why? We can be partners! We can find the other Dragonballs together."

"Well…I don't know…" Goku said in thought.

"C'mon Goku, your grandfather would be proud to see you traveling around, learning all sorts of thing about the real world!"

"Do you really think grandpa would be proud of me if I went along?"

"I'm sure of it! And you not going top believe all the things beyond this mountain." Bulma said.

'No! I simply will not allow it! My son traveling with a strange city girl! Evil emperor, being far away from home! I simply say no!" Bardock snapped.

"B-but Daddy…" Goku started.

Bulma smirked,"If you want Bardock you can come along too." Bardock looked at the girl. "You can come along and look after you son!" He nodded. Bardock made a small smirked. _"This girl can be useful I'll use her to get these Dragonballs and make a real wish. Like immorality or the revival of Vegeta-sei.' _he thought.

"Let me pack up our things first!"Bardock got up. He put Goku down and rushed to their rooms.

"Oh Goku you can't imagine what kinds of things you'll see out there. There's the sea, more water than you can imagine! And dinosaur that will eat you up if you let them! Oh, I can just see you now Goku, fighting some sort of monster! Because there are monsters out there." Bulma explained.

"That sound like fun! I'm sure am coming!" Goku cheered.

"Me too! I'm coming too whether you both like it or not. Dad's coming too!" Bardock said with two suit cases.

"Um…what's in those things?" Bulma asked.

"Oh just fresh clothes, toothpaste and toothbrushes, some armor, medicine…" his voice went real low, '2 scouters…"

"What was that last part?" Bulma asked.

"Nothing!" Bardock yelled quickly. "Alright you can do whatever you like but we keep our Dragonball girl. If you steal it, I promise I'll find you and destroy you!" he threatened.

Bulma stepped back on how scary he was and yelped quickly, "Alright you drive a hard bargain." _"They're both very stubborn. Especially the little one. They'll make good bodyguards while I make my wish. I'll wish for the most perfect boyfriend that ever lived!" _Bulma thought.

"Alright you two, from now own we are each partners!" Bulma announced as the three of them walked out.

"Tell me Bulma, how do you plan on the rest of the Dragonballs? We haven't got a clue where to begin looking!" Bardock asked.

Bulma puffed out her chest proudly and giggled. She pulled out her radar from her pouch and said, "Check this out. This is a Dragon Radar. I use this to track where the Dragonballs are! all we have to do to go where those other dots are. Soon, we'll find the other Dragonballs!

"Then let's go!" Goku said.

"Well since you ruined my car, I guess we're going to use another set of wheels." Bulma sighed. She reached in her pouch again and a case and opened. Inside the case her small capsules with color codes on them. "Let's see, Dynocap No. 9 would do the job." She pulled blue capsule out. "Both might wanna stand back." She advised. The guys looked confused. "Watch!" She pressed the button on the capsule and with one big BOM! Out came a motorcycle!

"Amazing! I never knew of such handy technology!" Bardock said in awe. Goku started poking at the machine with his pole. "Goku quit it. It's a machine son." Holding back his son. Bulma was already on. Bardock got on behind her and Goku on his shoulder.

"Here we go!" Bulma said then the motorcycle went super fast. The both of them were screaming. "This woman is a speed demon!" Bardock yelped!

'This is fun! This thing can go faster than I can run!" Goku laughed.

"Of course it does." Bulma snapped.

"Wee!!" Goku sang. He waved at his monkey friend as he passed by. Bardock was trying to hold on the moving vehicle. Soon they were out of the forest. Bardock sighed and looked back. So many memories here.

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Later during their trip down the mountain, Bardock and Goku were having an argument on high fast they wanted to go.

"Faster Bulma!" Goku whined.

"No slower. Any faster and I'll get a heart-attack!" Bardock said

Faster!

Slower

Faster!

Slower!

"Shut up! I'm going as fast as I want to." Bulma snapped. The two quieted down. Soon Bulma stopped the cycle and got up in a rush.

"What the hurry Bulma?" Bardock asked.

"A little pit stop! Be right back!" Bulma said as she headed towards behind a rock.

Goku got off and looked at his father. "Dad why doesn't Bulma just go here. Why is she so picky? I won't judge her by what seize she is."

Bardock twitched and sighed, "Son, I think it's time I give you "The Talk" The difference between boys and girls is…" before he could finish he heard Bulma scream. They both ran behind the rock and saw a giant dinosaur-like monster holding Bulma.

The monster growled, "Who the hell are you two?"

"My name is Son Bardock and this is my son, Son Goku…" Bardock said idly.

"Are you a friend of Bulma's or what?"" Goku asked. The monster chuckled and wrapped his tail around Bulma to free his other hand.

"Yeah that's it. As a matter of fact we have a fancy dinner engagement to go to, but we're running a little late." The monster lied pulling out some rope.

"I highly doubt it…" Bardock growled. Next thing he knows it, He was tied up next to Goku on a tree.

"Dad I don't think he was telling the truth." Goku said stupidly.

"No duh son." Bardock said sarcastically.

"Gee, kid you're a regular Einstein. See yah." The monster laughed and flew off with Bulma.

"Bulma, where you guys going?" What's going on?" Goku called.

Bardock grunted then pulled off the rope. "All right I've had enough. Stay here Goku.' Bardock ordered. Goku nodded. Bardock then jumped to the skies flying after the monster. The monster looked back and gasped when he saw Bardock flying after him. Bulma gasped to and screamed, "You can fly?"

Bardock ignored her and flew right in front of the monster. Bardock then with one punch on the monster's nose, he let go of Bulma and flew down. Goku ran and jumped high and yelled, "POWER POLE EXTEND!" And his pole extended. He hit the monster on the head sent it straight to the ground. Bardock caught Bulma bridal-style and grunted, "You're too much trouble girl." Bulma nodded meekly, she was still in shock on watching Bardock fly and beat the big monster with one punch.

Bardock landed down and placed Bulma on the ground. Goku's pole changed back to normal. The monster landed in the canyons. Goku laughed and jumped into his father's arms. Bardock smirked and put his son on his shoulder. "B-Bardock, y-you can fly?" Bulma stuttered.

Bar sheepishly scratched the back of his head and said, "Yeah, Goku hasn't leant it yet but I'm planning to teach him soon. I'm stronger than Goku and a lot powerful. I know thing that can blow your mind,"

Bulma nodded and signaled them to get back on the motorcycle. Now back on course the trio is about to embark on the adventures of the Dragonballs!

**TBC**

.


	4. Big Brother is Coming and Bedtime Story

I do not own any characters from Dragonball or Dragonball Z. They all belong to Akira Toriyama.

Meanwhile on Planet Frieza 43 a young Raditz paces back in forth in front of an annoyed prince Vegeta and a bored looking Nappa. "I still don't believe this! Can he actually fool us with that whole meteor story?" Raditz shouted.

"Shut up stupid. I knew it was him from the start. I never trusted Frieza from the first time I looked at him! Vegeta grumbled. "Anyway Vegeta-sei is gone with the rest of the sayain race." Nappa smirked a little. Vegeta noticed this and asked his bodyguard, "Why are you smiling imbecile?"

"Oh, I just heard a rumor about few surviving sayains!" Nappa said smartly.

Vegeta and Raditz ran in front of him and chorused, "Tell me you idiot!"

"Alright, alright calm down you two." Nappa said trying to calm the younger sayains. "I heard that Vegeta's little brother Tarble, Turles, and I think Raditz's dad Bardock and Raditz's little brother Kakarot survived."

"Hmph, like we need those low-class weaklings. Tarble had a reason to be banished, he couldn't fight! Turles was kidnapped by space pirates during his first mission. So where are Bardock and this Kakarot?" Vegeta grumbled.

"Yeah Nappa, where is my old man and my baby brother?" Raditz demanded.

Nappa thought for a moment and simply said, "I think he's on some planet called…what was it was again…E-arth or Earth or something."

Raditz rubbed his hand together and announced, "That settles it then. I'm going to Earth." Raditz turned to his space pod and typed in the coordinates for Earth.

Nappa asked, "What, you're actually going to Earth?"

Vegeta grunted, "Good riddance"

Raditz ignored him and got into the pod. The pod then jetted off the planet. The computer asked him while leaving the atmosphere: **Destination?**

Raditz cleared his throat and responded, "Planet Earth. Land me nearest where sayains Bardock and Kakarot are currently located."

**Understood. Estimated time: 3 weeks and 5 hours. **

Raditz grunted. _'Soon father I will be with you again. Little brother, I cannot wait to purge planets with you. Together, all three of us will overthrow Frieza and become the ultimate planet purging sayain warrior familt. Not even Prince Vegeta or Frieza will be able the stop us three.' _Raditz mused.

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It was nighttime, Bulma was sleeping in her tent while Bardock and Goku were to sleep outside. 'I like to sleep under stars." Bardock told Bulma.

Bardock placed the sleepy Goku in his sleeping bag. "Alright kiddo, bedtime." Bardock ordered,

"B-but I'm not sleepy daddy. Five more minutes." Goku yawned.

"Tomorrow you need all your energy to find the Dragonballs. Even a warrior needs to go to sleep." Bardock explained stripping off his sleepy son's gi; replacing them with his bedtime clothes. Bardock slipped Goku inside his sleeping bad before Goku pleaded sleepily, "Story…"

Bulma was woken up after Bardock telling Goku to sleep. When she heard story, she wanted to hear want kind of story do these tailed warriors tell. "Alright, one story then its bedtime." Bardock said softly. Bulma peeked from her tent looking at Bardock and Goku. Bardock was lying next to Goku and his sleeping bag. He took a deep breath and started his sayain bedtime story:

"_There once lived an ordinary low-class sayain. He was not rich, nor was he poor. He had a wife and a son, and he lived happily in the country without a worry or care. He was moderately strong and purged as many planets as he was assigned to. Even though he was so happy, he was so busy. In fact his wife was busy. That left his son all alone. There weren't even aware they even had son because they were wrapped up in their silly little lives._

_One day, the son wanted to prove himself to his father that he existed. Before his father the dinner table for work the son brought up, "Father, I wish to challenge you to a fight." _

_The father was incredibly late so he told his son, "Later, I shall fight you later."_

_The son understood and waited. Again when his father came home he asked the same question. He got the same answer over and over. For days the same question was brought up and the father ignored it. The son was greatly annoyed. Before his father could get to the door, the son kicked him the face. Surprised that his own son had harmed his he asked. "Why my son? Have I not given you food and clothes? Shelter and such. Why do you wish to fight me?_

_The son just said, 'I do not want money. I do not need any more clothes, I have enough food. This house is my shelter. All I want from you papa, is for you to notice me. For you to love me.'_

_For the first time since his son was born, he actually noticed him. He was the first sayain to shed tears. He cried and hugged his son tightly and said,"Forgive my son. I have been ignoring you for so long. I strive on to get possessions for you, but there is one thing I can give, but I did not. My love for you. I love you my son. He whimpered. _

_The End_

Bardock finished his story and looked down at Goku. He was snoring fast asleep. Bardock smirked and kissed his son's head. "Night Goku," he softly said as he closed his eyes. Bulma sighed. She couldn't tell if that story was happy or sad. What was sayain anyway? The race of the tailed people? What's with them and fighting anyway. _'Oh well. Goodnight my faithful bodyguards. Bardock you do have a soft side for your son."_ Bulma mused as she fell to sleep


	5. The Emperor's Quest

I do not own any characters from Dragonball or Dragonball Z. They all belong to Akira Toriyama.

It was dusk; it had been another traveling day for Bulma, Bardock, and Bardock's son Goku speed along on their quest to unite the seven Dragonballs. Knowing if they succeed, the eternal dragon will appear and grant them a single wish. Bulma's wish for a perfect boyfriend or Bardock's wish for either immortality or the revival of Vegeta-sei and the sayain race. For now, it was getting late as Bardock held on for dear life on the motorcycle while Goku laughed.

"Hey Bulma, let's stop here for a bowl for tasty frog soup!" Goku proposed.

"Forget it you two. We're gonna gave to be civilized from now on. It's not cool to be munching on frogs or toads and slimy things." Bulma hastily replied.

"We're not civilized? What's that suppose to mean girl?" Bardock inquired.

Bulma was just about to make a comeback before she was cut off by the growling of Goku's and Bardock's stomach. "Bulma I'm hungry." Goku whined. "Do lizards count?"

Bulma rolled her eyes. "I can tell this is going to be one long adventure…"

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Bulma stopped the cycle after a few minutes. Goku jumped off while Bardock steadily got off. "Hey Bulma, let's camp out here." Goku proposed.

"Well I'm not sleeping on the ground, I have my Dynocaps remember?" Bulma said.

"Aww, does the little city princess not know how to camp well!" Bardock teased. Bulma growled. Bulma reached into her pouch and pulled out her Dynocap case. "Hey don't tell me you have a bed in here girl."

"I've got more than that." Bulma bragged.

"I don't like those magic witch bombs. Grandpa says never use magic unless is to help someone." Goku said.

Bulma smirked, "Well I'm gonna help someone you both know very well. She's pretty and has blue hair." She pressed the button the biggest capsule on the case and threw it on the ground. Bardock and Goku got behind Bulma then a big explosion happened the capsule's place. When the smoke cleared up, was beetle-shaped house. "See isn't that cozy." Bulma joked as she headed inside, ""C'mon you two, what're you waiting for?"

"Impressive." Bardock said. _'If I knew these Earthlings had this kind of technology, I would've got some for Gohan and Kakarot ages ago.'_ Bardock mused. He smirked and he saw his son step back in awe and shock.

Goku took at his pole and went into an attack pose. "Get away Bulma! I can beat this big beetle monster!"

"That's very noble of you Goku…but it's just a house." Bulma said. Bulma went inside and clicked on the lights.

Goku ran in with Bardock behind him. Goku said in awe, "Whoa, you just made it bright, but it's still dark outside!"

Bardock shook his head. _'My poor clueless son."_ "Chill out Goku, it's a little something called, electricity. You have a lot you learn about the real world."

Goku stepped in slowly, looking around in awe. Bardock sighed and immediately sat down on the recliner chair. Bulma giggled on how silly Goku was acting while Bardock was watching in amusement. Goku turned to the TV and Bulma clicked it on just to tease him. He gasped at the moving pictures on the screen. "Dad, there's a man trapped in there! I think he's being tortured!" Goku cried. Bardock shook his head and glanced at a chuckling Bulma. She changed the channel to a soap opera.

The man on the TV said to the woman, "I love you for my darling."

The woman swooned, "Oh, Chad!" Soon the TV couple closed in for a kiss. Bardock felt a pang in his heart by watching this; he was remembering he said the same things to his wife back when they were dating on Vegeta-sei. He turned his head to Goku who was staring at the closing in kissing couple. Goku and Bardock then looked at Bulma who had heart in her eyes and was drooling a bit. Bardock sniggered, _'Females and their romantic fantasies…'_

While Bulma was distracted, Goku grabbed the remote. "Hmm…magic buttons."

Bulma was mumbling, "One little kiss…one kiss…" The TV couple was only inches away from each other. "Wow, here it comes!" Suddenly the channel changed to a monster movie. Bardock snapped out of his musings and Bulma screamed out of her day dreams. Bardock and Goku laughed when they saw Bulma fall over from shock. Goku had pressed a button, changing the channel.

"Very funny you two," Bulma growled,

"Hey Bulma, Dad, are you getting hungry or what. Because I'm starving," Goku whined.

"I'm really hungry too Bulma," Bardock added. Bulma rolled her eyes.

"Well you must be really hungry Bulma, cause you're drooling" Goku said.

Bulma wiped away the drool form the corner of her mouth and said, "Oh, now I'm embarrassed!" Bardock sniggered. Bulma got up and pinched her nose and said, "What's that horrible smell?" She sniffed again and said, "Ugh, Goku Bardock…you both need a major bath." Bardock blushed a little and went silent.

Goku tilted his head and asked, "Uh…what's a bath?" Bardock fell over anime style. _'Crap, I forgot to tell him what a bath was. Gohan always gave Goku bathes; and ever since he died, I never really bathed him or told him to take a bath. Really bathes slipped my mind.' _Bardock thought.

"Uh…that's sort of my fault Bulma," Bardock said sheepishly. Bulma glared at him, which burnt a hole, straight through Bardock. "Okay son, follow me and we can get this thing over with." Bardock sighed, getting up and going straight to the bathroom. Goku followed him.

Bardock filled the tub with warm water while going padded naked inside with a towel. Bardock looked at him and snapped, "Hey idiot, you're supposed to put the towel around your front. Especially if you're living with a girl."

Goku put the towel if front of his face and asked, "Like this?" Bardock groaned and slapped his fore head.

Goku was now in the tub, while Bardock was shirtless outside the tub scrubbing his hair hard. "I guess we need to scrub extra hard whatever fiendish fungus is making you smell for bad." Bardock said.

"Dad, are we done yet?" Goku whined, "I'm hungry."

"Well, you just got to hold it Goku. I'm not letting you out of this tub!" Bardock said strictly. Bardock turned the shower on and rinsed out the suds from his son's hair. Goku rubbed his eyes, Bardock soothed, "Relax son… it's just soap"

Bulma walked in the room and saw Goku rubbing his eyes; she saw his tail laying still. While Bardock got out getting himself a towel; Bulma gently picked up Goku's tail. "This thing is so silly Goku. But I'll have to give you and your dad points for originality. Let's take this silly tail off so you're father will have an easier time washing your back." She tugged on it; Goku gave a blood curdling scream.

Bardock rushed into the bathroom and saw Goku rubbing his tail. "Ow that hurts Bulma. I think its better that I wash my own back." Goku grumbled. His tail started to wiggled and sways in front of Bulma's face; it grabbed the back scrubber and started to scrub his own back. Bulma gaped and gasped at him.

Bardock politely pushed Bulma out of the way and said to her, "Our tails are real girl. If you pull on them it really hurts us. It's kinda disrespectful to us and our tail if you pull at them." Bulma gaped as the usual furry brown belt Bulma thought Bardock wore unraveled into a swaying furry brown tail. His tail curled around some soap and squirted on Goku's back for him. Bulma couldn't take it anymore, she screamed to the top of her lungs. Bardock fell down on the hard floor while Goku slipped in the tub. With a hand over his aching ear Bardock growled, "What's wrong with you girl?"

"Y-your tails, they're moving. The-they're r-real!" Bulma stuttered.

"Yes, I think I made a point on telling you." Bardock said annoyed.

"W-why do you have tails growing?" Bulma asked in shock.

"Well, I don't really know myself. All I know all boys have tails. It's no big deal; it's just the way we are. Dad knows more about this than me. Tell her Dad." Goku said as he dried himself off.

Bardock grunted and started, "Our people, the sayains were a people of war. A Spartan-like race if you will. Our people had tails, for it represents our honor and blood-line."

"S-so you mean to tell me there was a w-whole civilization on tailed people!" Bulma asked. Bardock nodded solemnly.

"Well I guess I can't say all boys had them because Grandpa didn't have a tail." Goku thought out loud.

'See, see, normal people don't have tails. If so, you're grandpa would've had one!" Bulma yelled.

"But Gohan was a very odd fellow yah know." Bardock laughed heartily. Bulma fell over. "What's wrong with her?" Bardock asked Goku as his tail wagged slowly behind him. Goku shrugged.

"You're both the real oddballs!" She snapped.

Goku began to get dress while Bardock decided to take his. After his turn, he wrapped his towel around himself and told Bulma heartily with his tail swaying under "The bath's all yours girl." Bulma blushed, just noticing his hot muscular chest.

Bulma sighed, "A bath sounds wonderful…"

IIII

A bubble popped as Bulma lied in her bubble bath. "After a rough day with those morons, I can relax with a bubble bath." She thought out loud. She sighed, this was so relaxing. She turned her head and saw Goku staring straight at her. She shrieked a little and ducked her head under the water. "What the hell do you think you're doing? I'm taking a bath!" he snarled.

"Well I wanted to help you wash your back because you don't have a tail." Goku simply replied. Bulma, annoyed, started to throw all the things she could get her hands on at Goku.

As if on cue, Bardock rushed into the bathroom and swiped Goku out. "Sorry Bulma, I'll talk to him. Continue!" Bardock said quickly, giving her a cheesy smile. He didn't look at her, knowing a woman's privacy. He ran out with Goku, not bearing to look back.

"D-dad, why'd you pull me out?" Goku asked his father.

'Bulma's a woman, a woman. Boys aren't allowed to see girls naked until they're a lot older. They can get real grouchy and mean if you see them naked. Trust me from experience." Bardock explained, shuddering. He remember the he and Toma used to peek at girls at either the bathhouse or in the girls locker rooms back when they were younger. They were slapped and nearly beaten to death by them.

"But she scrubbed my back no problem."

"It's not the same. A girl has a few…private things that boys don't have."

"Gee…it isn't her fault. I guess she's ashamed for not having a tail."

"No she's not ashamed for not having a tail. Bulma might be one of the prettiest young girls you will ever meet. But, there are other fish in the sea as they say." Bardock chuckled.

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Bulma was growling to herself. "How dare that little brat walk into my bath! Didn't Bardock give him "The Talk?" He doesn't understand privacy or even knocking!" The she overheard Bardock's and Goku's conversation.

Gee…it isn't her fault. I guess she's ashamed for not having a tail."

Bulma then yelled out of frustration, "I'm fed up with the both of you for the last time! I don't want a stupid tail and stay out of my bathroom!" She took a shampoo bottle and threw it Bardock's head.

"Ow! What did I do? It was Goku not me! And for your information, tails represents our honor and heritage!" Bardock yelled.

"Like, I give a damn about your heritage!" Bulma screamed. She could hear Bardock growl and grumble some curses under his breath.

Bulma was drying and brushing her hair and grumbling, "It's about time I get a little privacy." Her long blue hair was down except for a lock of hair was in a high pony-tail. She wore a rolled up long pink nightshirt. She was interrupted by a growling sound. She looked in the mirror and saw Goku.

"I'm starving…" Goku announced.

"BARDOCK, KEEP GOKU OUT OF MY ROOM! I DEMAN PRIVACY!!" Bulma screamed.

"I heard yah girl! Keep your panties on, I'll watch him." Bardock's voice came from another room.

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Meanwhile at a faraway castle; a fox dog-like man was kneeling before the blue emperor who was feasting on delicious delicacies. "Well?" The emperor asked, "Did you, bring me a Dragonball Shu? "

Shu replied, "No sire, I got real hungry so I came back."

"You won't so much as a bone until you bring me a Dragonball!" the emperor threatened. He wiped his mouth and took out a green case. He opened it revealing the one-star Dragonball. The emperor sighed at the sight of it, "Look how it sparkles so brilliantly. And yet it is only one it's only one piece to the puzzle." He turned to Shu and yelled "I want those other Dragonballs! I want them so bad I could just…explode!" The emperor raved. He glared and Shu and said menacingly, "You know Shu; word of this can never leave this chamber."

Shu gulped and said softly, "I would never ever tell anyone about this, you're royal highness."

"Well we can't be too sure yah know. There can't be any wisecracks. Something simply cannot allow leaking out." The emperor said sourly.

"My lips are sealed." Shu agreed.

Suddenly a tile in the ceiling opened and out dropped gracefully the pretty woman. She kneeled and said, "Emperor, I have come to report."

The emperor waltzed over and asked, "I trust you were able to bring me back another Dragonball?"

She said grimly, "No sire. But I do have some valuable information."

"I certainly hope so. Tell me more"

"Yes sir. A deep cover agent of ours landed in a known as Skull Valley. Just before he left his plane, he described a mysterious light-like glow."

"Was the light a Dragonball?"

"I don't know sire. We never heard from him again…No one has ever return from Skull Valley."

"Hmmm…Take Shu with you Mai and see is there's a Dragonball there. "

"But sir, I have obedience school today…" Shu added.

"Never mind that!" the emperor yelled.

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Goku, Bardock, and Bulma were sitting around a table. On the table was salads and French bread in a basket and cups of coffee. "I'm starving…" Goku repeated. He took a bread and at it without cutting it.

Bardock was eating his salad. "I'd prefer meat than vegetables…" he mumbled like a child.

"This isn't food at all! This bread is mushy and tasteless and my soup is too bitter!" Goku whined.

'Yeah this drink is a bit on the bitter side," Bardock said taking another disgusting sip.

"It's not soup you meat-heads. It's coffee. How do you expect to get big and strong you two don't eat right." Bulma said drinking her coffee.

"We have a much preferred meat diet. We eat our vegetables and fruit, we both love meat." Bardock said.

"Whatever…" Bulma rolled her eyes at the older man.

Goku got out of his chair and agreed, "Yah know, I think you have a good point there Bulma. I always like to try new things. Eating meat all the time gets a bit boring."

Bardock glared at his son and grumbles, 'I thought you love meat…" He saw Goku putting his shoes on and his pole. He asked, "Son, where are going."

"To give Bulma her privacy and to get some real food." Goku said walking out the door.

"But the closest store is 100 miles away!" Bulma called.

Bardock chuckled and said to the girl across from his, "He's not going to the market." He got up and got his shoes on too and followed after Goku.

"Geez, men…" Bulma groaned.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

A wolf howled at the moon as an airplane passed the deep woods. Goku and Bardock were jumping from tree to tree quickly and gracefully like a monkey. They both landed on the ground and Goku said, "Well, we got ourselves an appetizer. But a centipede for a full meal." In his hand was big dead centipede. Bardock sighed and nodded. They heard a loud rumbling sound and looked up to the sky and saw the airplane in the air. Of course it was dark and Goku and Bardock didn't know it was an air plane; well for Goku he didn't know what an airplane was!

"Hey Dad look! A big bird!" Goku cheered.

"An excellent real meal." Bardock agreed.

The airplane flew over a canyon, inside were Shu and Mai. Shu had fear on his face. "Down there is Skull Valley." Mai pointed out.

"C-can't we just say we went down and looked." Shu nervously suggested. Mai shook her head.

"No we better go down and check it out." She replied. She then pushed the wheel down, making the plane go lower into the valley. Mai landed the plane and they both stepped out. "This place gives me the creeps." Mai said.

"That's for sure," Shu added. The both stepped down the rocks for their search. The stepped down into a valley of skeletons, Mai accidently stepped on one, she gave a disgusted look. "I want to chew on one of these bones but I'm too scared!" Shu shrieked.

"Let's just make sure we get out of here with our own bones." Mai shivered. A red light flashed. They looked to see where the flash was. "That could be the Dragonball. We better check."

Suddenly a huge shadow came over the duo. They heard a child's scream Goku and Bardock landed and jump from a nearby dead branch. The both landed right in front of the Mai and Shu and in front of their "bird".

"Those two like to jump. Especially that kid." Shu said.

"He's a jumper that kid. But why an adult man is doing that is beyond me." Mai said.

"They look alike so they must be father and son!" Shu said.

"Why don't you two scram? This place is dangerous." Mai ordered. Bardock scowled and folded his arms. Mai and Shu flinched a little at Bardock's scowl, he was very scary looking. Bardock hated to be told what to do, especially by a woman.

"I don't take orders from a woman." Bardock growled.

"It's gonna get dangerous if you get between us and our bird!" Goku threatened.

"We spotted it first and now we're taking it home for dinner." Bardock added. The duo stared at the Sons.

"These two are real fruit bowls. The kid's nuts and the other is a crazy old man." Shu said.

"Who you calling old?" Bardock snapped.

"I think I hear your mommy and wife calling." Mai lied. Suddenly something growled and two flashes of red light appeared in the background. Soon thousand of red lights ended up to be thousands of pair of red eyes of wolves. They surrounded all four of them. Bardock and Goku remained unfazed by the wolves.

"T-that weren't Dragonballs Mai." Shu stuttered.

"N-no kidding." Mai stuttered back in fear. O

On the other hand, Bardock and Goku had big grins of their faces. "Dad, they look tasty." Goku told his father.

"They sure do, son.' Bardock licked his lips. The pack of wolves started to pounce on them. Goku and Bardock were punching and kicking every wolf that came near them with ease. Bardock didn't even break a sweat. Goku was enjoying his time easily beating up the wolves. A few wolves were chasing Mai and Shu. Before one tried to bite Shu's tail, Bardock kicked the wolf away. Goku was beating the wolves with his power pole. While the Sons were in the heat of the battle; Mai and Shu took off in their plane.

"That was close." Mai sighed.

Goku kicked two wolves and saw Mai and Shu getting away. "Hey dad, look! Our bird, it's getting away!" Goku yelled.

Bardock looked up and growled, "No it's not!" he growled. Bardock finally having enough, he shot a ki blast, obliterating all the wolves. He grabbed Goku and placed his on his shoulder and flew off towards the "bird." He sideways kicked the plane, causing it to shake. Mai and Shu screamed in panic as their plane flew crash down. It landed and exploded. Bardock smirked at his victory and looked and a cheerful Goku. He flew down to see his kill.

When they landed, Goku got off and saw a crash land of metal and steam. He poked a piece of metal wing off from the plane and groaned, "Dog gone it, this bird is rock hard."

"Oh well. My mistake. Let's go home Goku." Bardock sighed. Goku nodded and jumped on Bardock's shoulder; Bardock soon flew back to the capsule house.

In the crash Shu asked groggily, "D-did that crazy old man just fly Mai?"

I-I think so Shu." Mai replied.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Back at Capsule house, Bulma was in her chair reading a magazine. "Bulma we're back!" Goku cheered. Bulma looked up and walked over to the door. She opened it and saw Bardock and Goku. "Look what we got us for supper" Goku smiled holding up his dead centipede. Bardock was hold two dead wolves over his shoulders.

"A centipede, plus a special treat." Bardock chuckled turning around showing the dead wolves. Bulma went bug eyed and screamed and shut the door in their faces.

The two sayain males looked at each other and said in unison, "Girls are so weird."

So instead, Bardock had to roast the wolves and centipede. "Girl, are you serious about not eating with us. It's gonna be delicious." Bardock yelled to the house.

"You're both grossing me out Bardock! I can't believe you're both gonna eat that!" Bulma cried.

I

"I still can't believe you both ate the whole entire thing!" Bulma shrieked. Letting to Sons back into the house.

"Stop you're caterwauling. You sound like a harpy!" Bardock complained.

"Am not!" Bulma snapped. "Ugh, get in there and brush your teeth you two. You both have wolf breath!"

"If I recall, I'm the adult and parent here.' Bardock said.

I

I'm happy cause I'm full. I'm happy cause I'm full. I'm happy cause I'm full! I am I am I am! ~ Goku sang while bouncing his laying body in the bed.

"Get off my bed right now." Bulma ordered. "Go sleep with Bardock on the floor." She laid a big blanket on the floor.

"What! I'm not going to sleep on the floor!" Bardock yelled.

Oh yes you are. My house, my rules!" Bulma snapped.

"Well I'm the adult and I'm older than you. You can't tell me what to do!"

"Oh c'mon, you may be an old man; but you have the brain of a stubborn child!"

"Girl, watch it. Don't call me old!" Bardock growled. "Fine; I'll sleep on the damn floor with Goku."

"Maybe she just grumpy for not having a tail," Goku suggested. Bardock sniggered.

"Mention about tails again and you'll get a smack!"" Bulma snapped. Bulma filled her mug with water and began to brush her teeth. "Hey Bardock, why were you and Goku living out in the mountains anyway. I can guess this Gohan guy isn't really your dad." She asked. She looked to see Goku snoring soundly in Bardock's arms.

"It's true, Gohan wasn't my real father. Back when Goku was a week old infant; I was in the middle of rebelling and trying to avenge my fallen friends/comrades. One of his right hand man Dodoria sent his men to assassinate me and my team. I was in the med ward, but I was too late." Bardock began grimly telling his tale. "I tried to kill the tyrant to avenge my team, I also found out he was going to blow up my people. I was injured, but I managed to escape the blast. I came out here looking for Kakarot. I found him; next day I met Gohan and he gave me a home and kindness. He taught me and Goku martial arts and the true meaning of life. He gave Kakarot that name Goku. I owe a lot to Gohan." Bardock sighed, stroking his son's hair.

Bulma slipped herself into bed and said, "Wow I didn't know you were put through a lot. I'm sorry."

"It's alright. It's not your fault my people are all dead."

"By the way, what was the name of this tyrant guy? He sounds like a real jerk.

"His name is a cold and evil name. A name that shakes the universe. His name is…Frieza." Bardock then closed his eyes for slumber.

"Frieza…" Bulma repeated quietly to herself. She looked at the two snoring boys. _'That guy sound powerful and evil. Does Bardock really want Goku to beat him?'_

III

The next morning, Goku awoke from his bed. He saw that his father was gone. He got up and yawned big. "Golly, what a night. Dad must've gone outside for morning training." Goku said to himself. Outside Bardock was throwing practice punches and kicks for a workout; he didn't notice something was moving towards them nearby. Goku waiting inside and whined, "Bulma you're moving so slow you'll turn into a turtle."

"I guess you're right Goku." Bulma said. "By the way, where's your dad?" Bulma asked brushing her hair.

Goku walked and looked out of the window; he saw his father shirtless training. "He's just doing his morning training and exercises." He replied.

'Does all that man think about his training and working out? When I find my true love, I hope he doesn't take all his time training. **(A/N: Oh the far future's bitter irony.)** Goku ignored her and watched the coffee maker run. "I want to look good when we find the Dragonballs; but what would you both care about looking good." Bulma sighed, taking the coffee out and pouring it.

"You want some coffee?" she asked.

"No thanks, I think I'm gonna get some fresh air and maybe go train with Dad." Goku said bitterly to Bulma. He walked outside to see his father sweating the morning light. His father looked saw cool. Goku ran next to his moving father. Goku took a deep breath and start to stretch out his joints. He ran over to a big boulder and started to try and lift it up. Bardock smirked at his son's determination to become a strong warrior like him. Goku lifted the boulder up steadily, and grinded his teeth. The he squished the boulder into sediments.

Bardock laughed heartily, "That's my boy! Tough as nails, strong like steel!"

Goku ran over to a smaller brown boulder and lifted it up with ease. Then the boulder talked, "Whoa there."

Goku screamed and dropped the brown boulder. Bardock looked and said, "Hey it's a giant turtle…what's it doing here so far from the ocean…"

The turtle coughed and said, "Ow, new pain."

"D-dad, Bulma really did turn into a turtle! I guess it changes out plans a bit!" Goku said stupidly.

"Son that's not Bulma, Bulma is over there." Bardock sighed, pointing his thumb to Bulma waiting in the doorway.

"Goku who're you speaking to out there?" Bulma asked. She looked at the giant brown turtle and asked, 'Who're you.

"I thought it was you." Goku said.

"It's a turtle." Bardock corrected.

"Strange, a tortoise shouldn't be living here. Shouldn't you be living by the sea?" Bulma asked

"Yes, I'm quite concerned because I'm so far away from home. By the way can you spare some salt water?" the tortoise asked. Bardock gave the poor creature a look of sympathy.

'Sure' I'll get 'cha some" Bulma agreed.

I

The tortoise was gulping away a bucket of salt water while the others just looked at him. The tortoise sighed and thanked them ,"Good sea water. Aromatic, yet full bodied. "

Yeah, I think it's an 87." Bulma said.

"Nope an 86." The tortoise argued slowly.

"Are you sure about that?" Bardock asked."

He nodded. The tortoise said, "I know my water."

"What're you doing here?" Bardock asked.

"Well I'm lost. I'm just plum plain old lost." The tortoise said grimly. "I got in a long foot race with a hare and took a wrong turn and I've been looking for the sea ever since."

'You poor thing," Bardock sighed.

"I hate to tell you this, but the sea is in the opposite direction.' Bulma said, "Wait here, I'll got get you a map." Bulma went back inside. She came back with a map book and explained, "According to this, the sea is a 100 miles away."

"Great, that'll take me 20 years." The tortoise grimaced.

"That seems like a long time." Goku pointed out.

"I wish there was a way we can help you." Bulma sighed.

"I got it! Would you like to carry you to the sea Mr. Tortoise?" Goku asked.

"That's a great idea Goku!" Bardock exclaimed.

"Why yes, thank you!" the tortoise said.

"Are you both nuts?" Bulma shrieked.

"But you said you wished you could help. And besides, I've never been to the see before Bulma." Goku explain.

"I didn't mean that for real Goku. We're on an adventure, we don't have time to transport a turtle okay?" Bulma snapped.

"C'mon girl, have a heart. This poor tortoise wants to go home, and my boy wants to see the sea for the first time!" Bardock smirked.

"Argh, I do have very big heart!" Bulma growled.

"Argh you're impossible. All you've been doing his brushing you're hair and only caring about the way you look!" Goku argued. Bardock was surprised to see his son talking back so smartly.

"Fine I can collect the 7 Dragonballs without you both!" Bulma yelled.

Goku put tortoise on his shoulder and asked, "All all women like this where you come from."

"No, most have tails." Tortoise replied. Bardock smirked and scowled and Bulma. Goku ran towards the direction on the ocean. Bardock followed close behind.

Bulma made a face at them. "Belch, I hope you get a back-ache you little twerp!" Bulma yelled. "Who need them anyway? Bardock is annoying while Goku is a moron who doesn't know any better. Even if they're the strongest two guys I know, there is nothing scary around here." Bulma grumbled to herself. She turned her head and saw a giant T-Rex and dinosaurs roaring and stomping in the nearby forest.

Bulma hopped on her motorcycle and called out, "STOP!!! Stop or I'll run you both down!"

"We should stop. That girl scares me." Tortoise shuddered.

"She's just a spoiled bratty little city girl." Bardock mocked.

Bulma rode over and stopped next to the group. "Well I'm surprised to see you. I thought you'd be combing your hair." Goku said.

"I'm not. I knew you'd come running back to us." Bardock smirked.

"Oh put a sock in it." Bulma growled. "I've decided you forgive you both." Bulma snorted and rode ahead.

Bardock shook his head, "That girl…she's reminds me of your mother yah know that." Bardock said as the continued on.

"Really? I thought Mom would be nicer." Goku said and he ran ahead with tortoise on his back.

_**TBC**_


	6. The Nimbus Cloud of Roshi

I do not own any characters from Dragonball or Dragonball Z. They all belong to Akira Toriyama.

Our heroes, Goku, Bulma, and Goku's father Bardock have decided to take a detour; and are helping a lost tortoise find his way back to the sea. Goku ran with the tortoise on his back while Bulma and Bardock are riding by motorcycle beside him. "I hope we get to the sea soon. I'm getting real hungry." Goku whined.

"Me too; besides, I think I'm getting motion-sickness from this stupid vehicle." Bardock complained. He his stomach churned over again. "Oh my poor stomach."

"Stop complaining Bardock. You were the one that asked me to give you a ride." Bulma said.

"That's because my legs were getting tired. I'm not old, but I'm not as young as you both.' Bardock said.

"Y'know I was thinking about. This is probably the nicest thing anyone's done for me." Tortoise piped up.

"That's alright this is no big deal." Goku grinned.

"We were more than glad to help you." Bardock added.

"Well I just wanted to thank you both." Tortoise said.

Bulma was getting annoyed. She'd rather find the Dragonballs. 'We'll you three quit yapping and just concentrate on where we are going. Because at this rate, it'll take forever," She snapped.

"Why are you always complaining girl? Try thinking happy thoughts instead of negative thoughts." Bardock suggested.

"Hold on a second you guys." Bulma said. She stopped her motorcycle, with Goku pausing for her. "I gonna check the map." She looked at it and said, "Not bad, there's only 2 more miles."

"Wow we're close." Bardock stated.

"Boy, that's great!" Goku cheered.

Tortoise nodded in agreement. "I can't wait to get into the water."

III

Unknowing to our now moving ahead travelers, they were being watched viva telescope. The watcher chuckled menacingly. It was a bear tiger-like man; he licked his lips at the sight of the 4. "At last, a tasty meal!" He smirked.

IIII

As the group sped along the road they were stop in the middle of the road by the tiger man. "Stop right there!" He ordered. They stopped there. Bulma shrieked at his sight. Bardock got off the cycle, folded his arms carelessly, and scowled menacingly. Goku just tilted his head. "Heh Heh, hand over the turtle, or you won't get out of here alive.' He growled. The bear man had a scar over his eye, that eye had no pupil. "I just love eating sea turtles."

"Actually he's a sea tortoise. And I don't think you'll be getting a meal buster." Bardock said coolly.

"Who asked you old man!" the bear man growled. Bardock twitched in anger.

"Goku put the tortoise down and let's get outta here!" Bulma stammered poking Goku.

Bardock shook his head at Bulma, _'That girl is such a cowardly baby,' _she thought bitterly. Goku just stuck out his tongue and blew a raspberry at the monster. Bardock chuckled at his son's immaturity. "That's my boy." He announced proudly.

"Huh? What? Don't be a fool little monkey boy. Save your skin. I'm giving you the chance of a lifetime. Take it kid," The monster roared.

"Goku you idiot, you're gonna get us killed. Give him to him" Bulma shrieked.

Goku looked down, his face covered in shadows. Bardock glared at the monster. "D-did you just call me a monkey?" Goku said darkly. "Besides, I'm not giving my new friend to him. And besides…he called me a monkey."

'Are you nuts Goku! He just called you a monkey. Is that an insult or something to you?"

Bardock had serious look on his face. He replied, "Yes, monkey is an insult to us tailed folk. It's the worse insult to us sayains of all. It questions on intelligence and honor. It is our most hated word. You must never call us that if you know what's good for you." He said it darkly.

Bulma thought, _'Wow, then that means Goku just got offended. I wonder what he's gonna do to him.' _Bulma thought.

The monster growled and pulled out his sword, "Alright then, I'll have you all!" He raised the giant blade high, ready to swing and slash. Bulma panicked and rode off, leaving Goku, Tortoise, and Bardock to face the monster.

"Come back here Bulma! You cowardess!" Bardock shouted.

"Tortoise I think you better hop down." Goku said. Tortoise began to scream. The monster swung his sward, but Bardock and Goku dodged and jumped to safety. Tortoise crawled off of Goku's back and crawled away, "It's just you and me now. I'm gonna make you pay for calling me monkey!"

"Hahaha, do you really you're cute. Don't 'cha kid?' The monster growled, stepping closer. Bardock glared at him. _'I cannot interfere with this one Kakarot .This is you're battle, fight it with heart and honor. Make his pay for disgracing you, me, our people, and our tails.' _Bardock thought while watching and sitting on a boulder. 'Well I eat punks like you for breakfast! The monster threatened.

Goku laughed, he wasn't taking this much too seriously. The monster swung in for another attack. Goku easily dodged the monster's big sword's swings. Goku jumped high and teased, "Miss me!" He flipped behind the monster. 'Over here bear breath."

"This is nuts! Let's beat it!" Bulma called.

"Go Goku! Let's go son, finish him off!" Bardock cheered.

"Don't encourage him. What kind of a father are you!" Bulma yelled.

The monster snickered. "Hahaha, I like your style." He closed in to Goku. He tried to swipe Goku with his bear claw, but Goku disappeared in front of him.

"Yoo-hoo!" Goku mocked. The bear monster looked and saw Goku was standing and giggling on his big sword's blade. Goku jumped on the bear's snout and got into offense position. Bardock moved a little to get a better view._ 'Let's see what you've learn my son'_ Bardock thought. Goku muscles bulged up, revealing he was very muscular for his age. Goku then threw a big punch at the monster's head. It was so hard and hurt so bad, it made the bear monster fall over. It was a one hit K-O!

Goku jump with ease off the falling bear and landed with grace. Bardock laughed heartily and applauded his son. Goku gave the two finger victory sign during mid-jump. "Ha-ha, that's that," He laughed.

"That's my boy. That's my Goku!" Bardock exclaimed. He ran over and tousled his son's spiky back hair.

"Yeah, sure.' Bulma said. She was still in shock with tortoise about how strong his was. "Whatever you s-say."

Goku and Bardock walked over to bystanders. "Are you okay?" Goku asked the tortoise.

"Yes, I'm fine, thanks to you." The tortoise said.

"So some creatures think you're good to eat huh." Bardock said.

"Huh, what? Oh my, oh my!" The tortoise panicked slowly. "Not at all! I'd probably be the m-most poisonous meal you'd ever eat! Hahaha…" He didn't want to get eaten by Goku or Bardock.

"Thought so…" Bardock said. Goku pulled tortoise back on his back and continued to walk. Bardock got back on Bulma's motorcycle. "You don't look very tasty to me or dad anyway. Right Daddy?"

"Yeah. I'm not a big fan of eating turtles." Bardock said idly. Tortoise sighed in relief.

"Alright then, let's get going." Bulma said she started her cycle and the 4 continued on.

"Okie dokie!" Goku chirped and ran after them.

IIIIII

Soon, our heroes arrive a beach, a beach with a big ocean. The four of them stared, at the magnificent view. "Daddy, what's that?" Goku mumbled. He ran over down the road to the sand. Bulma and Bardock followed after. "Yeah! Whoa! We're here! We're here!" Goku cheered. Bardock smiled; whenever his son was happy, he was happy. Goku ran over and stared happily at the sea. "Oh boy! Look Daddy!"

"I see son. I see the sea." Bardock said as he got over the cycle and walked next to him.

"So Goku, what do you think." Bulma asked.

"It's the biggest river I've ever seen!" He said innocently.

"It's the sea son. The ocean, silly." Bardock explained.

I

Tortoise got off Goku's back and lay in sea, they were saying there farewells. Bardock, Bulma, and Goku were all happy to see the tortoise go home. Bulma yawned a bit. "Wow, you're sure are lucky to live in such a beautiful place." Goku commented.

"Indeed." Bardock agreed,

Tortoise had a tear in his eye. "Yup, and thanks to you both I was able to get back safe and sound." Tortoise bowed his head.

"Well bye-bye!" Goku said.

Tortoise soon swam away. He paused and turned around asking, "Could you please there a minute. I have a little something I wanna give you for appreciation."

"Sure" Bardock called out.

"Oh wow.' Goku said.

"Probably crown jewels" Bulma guessed.

"I'll be back as soon as I can!" Tortoise called out. He nodded his head and continued off. "Hello?

"Hey wait a second. We don't have time to collect dust!" Bulma said suddenly. Tortoise soon dove underwater. She sighed, 'He's gone…"

III

Waves rolled on the shore as the trio waited. Goku and Bardock had token off their shoes and rolled up their pants, they were letting their feet get soaked. Bulma lifted up her nightshirt and followed, "I wish that I brought my swim suit with me. This water's just perfect!" Bulma said.

Goku bent down and drank some of the ocean water. 'Belch! Yuck!! This water tastes salty!"

"Goku, you shouldn't drink sea water. It's salt water, very salty and unhealthy." Bardock advised.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

A white stallion bucked a bit. "Whoa, there!" The emperor said as he sat on its saddle. The emperor had a big crown on a scepter. The village in front of him, with its villagers bowed before him. The emperor rode down with a smirk on his face.

But sadly all this was a daydream of the emperor. He giggled at this daydream, he held the Dragonball in his hands. Suddenly, Mai and Shu then bursted the doors yelling, "Your highness!"

"What?" The emperor asked annoyed. "Spit it out, did you get the Dragonball?"

The duo gasped for breath. "Well…" Shu breathed.

"T-there was a slight problem with the-the information that we received sire." Mai finished.

"And…?" The emperor demanded.

"It was bogus! We were nearly killed by wolves!" Mai shrieked.

"And then we crashed on a count of some crazy kid and his loony flying father! And the…" Shu yelped

"SILENCE!" The emperor yelled. "I'm sick of your lame-brained excuses! Now, get out of here and get that Dragonball if it's the last thing you do! Do you understand?"

"Sir!" They saluted and unison.

Suddenly the phone rang. "Ah, the hot-line," The emperor said calmly. He picked it up and asked, "Hello? What is it that you say? Where is it?" Mai and Shu looked at each other. 'I see…you did! Well done!" The emperor hung up and grinned. "Another Dragonball has been found." He exclaimed. "An old master named Roshi has it. You're in luck!"

"What? Where is it?" Shu asked.

"It's on a tiny island in the Emerald Sea. Just southeast from here." The emperor replied.

Mai said, "Let's be careful. Could be another bump steer."

"Never mind that! Go get me that Dragonball" The emperor ordered.

"Yes sir!" They chorused.

Mai, Shu, and the emperor all ran to the hanger, where another airplane resided. Mai looked and said, "Emperor, you never went on a mission with us before."

"That was before! I can't trust you on your own anymore!" The emperor snapped. The bad guy trio got in; the plane soon went off to lift off. Then it left the big palace.

IIIIIIIIIIIIII

Meanwhile, the good guy trio was waiting for the tortoise on the beach. Bulma was drawing pictures in the sand with a stick. Goku and Bardock were working on a sand castle together. She looked and saw a strange figure on the horizon. "Hey what's that?" she asked.

Bardock turned his head and shrugged. "Whatever it is its heading straight towards us. They got up and walked near the coast. Goku hid a little bit cutely behind his father's big muscular leg.

"Oh it's the tortoise; and there's someone on his back!" Goku said.

"Wow! It's like you've got altered vision. Pretty cool Goku." Bulma complimented.

"It's in his blood. I can see it too." Bardock said.

There was a person on the tortoise's back. He had a purple shell strapped on his back. The tortoise neared quickly and the trio stared.

"Sorry you waited so long. I had to get my master," Tortoise called out.

"Get a load at this guy," Bardock said in a daze. The tortoise's master was a bald old man and carried a big wooden sage staff. He had red and green sunglasses on. And a long white beard. He wore a red tropical shirt, gray khaki short, and sandals. No one yet noticed the orange orb necklace he wore. "Well hello kids and sir." The old man greeted, waving his hand.

"Welcome ashore," Bardock said. "Nice to meet 'cha." _'He's a cool dresser.'_ He mused.

"Heh, thank you for helping my tortoise." The old man said.

"No problem mister." Goku replied.

The old man jumped on the tortoise's back and landed on the beach. "I'm Roshi, the turtle hermit." He introduced.

"Uh…a turtle hermit huh…" Bulma said.

Roshi turned to tortoise and asked, "Which one of 'em help yah?"

'It's the little boy there and his father. The big man with the scar on his cheek." Tortoise pointed out with his flipper.

Roshi walked over to Goku and said to him, "I want to thank you very much. I have a present I want to give you as a token of my gratitude."

"Hear that Goku?" Bardock said happily. Goku nodded. Roshi walked over to the shore. He swung his sage staff in the air and called out, "Come magic carpet!"

"Wow, what's he doing?" Bulma asked excitedly.

"What in the world is a magic carpet?" Goku asked. Bardock shrugged.

"What's a magic carpet? It's a carpet you can sit on and fly anywhere you want. There not real though, at least I don't think so." Bulma explained.

"Oh, but Dad promised me he'd teach me how to fly when I get bigger," Goku said.

"A magic carpet does sound good. It will help you get used to flying around before the big leagues of flying.' Bardock said. _'But seriously, a magic carpet. And they call me a crazy old man." _

"Uh…hey master. I was under the impression that you took the magic carpet to the cleaners." The tortoise piped up.

"Oh that's right! That's a really good point there!" Roshi yelped. He trio fell down anime style. Roshi started to think.

"I knew magic carpets weren't real." Bulma snorted.

"Well, the other option in the Kinto-un, the flying nimbus. But am I really ready to give it up?" The old man thought out loud. He snapped his fingers and said, "Why not? If he could ride, it's yours!" He raised his sage staff up again and called, "Come to me Kinto-un!"

"He's weird." Goku commented.

"And they call me a crazy old man." Bardock commented as well.

"I think it's his mind that's clouded." Bulma added.

"Have patience young ones. It's one its way." Roshi said. Suddenly in the sky came a moving golden yellow cloud. "Oh, here it comes!" Bardock looked up and he and the others gasped at the cloud coming their way. "See, what I tell yah."

"Wow! Goku chirped.

"I guess it's for real after all." Bulma said.

"No kidding. Very impressive; nice entrance. And I thought you were crazy, you're just weirdly cool." Bardock teased.

The cloud came down and parked itself in front of Goku. "Don't be afraid, she's as sweet as candy." Roshi said. The trios gasped and expect the cloud. Goku liked it.

"Do you mind if I have I taste?" Goku asked innocently.

"You don't eat it you little baboon!" Roshi snapped.

"How's this thing work exactly old man?" Bardock asked.

"If you can get on this baby, you'll be able to fly wherever you want!" Roshi explained.

"If this thing is so special, how come a guy like you doesn't use it? What's wrong with it?" Bulma asked.

'Hmm…there's nothing at all wrong with it." Roshi said quickly

"Boy, ha-ha. Now I can fly around with dad. I can't wait to try!" Goku cheered.

"Well go ahead, but you must listen you must listen to me very carefully before navigating the skies on this special cloud. You can only fly this is you are good and are pure of heart." Roshi said.

Bardock was uncomfortable now, _'No full-blooded sayain in truly good and pure of heart. We're cold blooded killers!'_ he thought

"Wow! Goku breathed.

"Just watch first so you can learn the finer points," Roshi said proudly. He attempted to jump, but went right through it! Bardock and Bulma laughed hard. Roshi grumbled.

"Are you okay master?" You must've done something naughty." Tortoise said as he helped Roshi up.

"Be quiet!" Roshi hissed.

"Now let me try!" Goku said.

"Uh son, maybe you shouldn't…" Bardock started.

Goku already had jumped and landed comfortably on the cloud. Roshi, Tortoise, Bulma, and Bardock all gaped and gasped. '_I don't believe it! I full-blooded sayain is actually good and pure of heart. The accident perhaps…no it couldn't have. He's been always a sweet little kid.'_ Bardock thought.

Goku started and dance on it and cheer, "Yeah, I did it I did it I did it! Did you see me dad? Dee you see me? Look at me look at me look at me!"

"I sure as hell did son. I sure did…" Bardock said.

"He sure did…" tortoise had.

"Hoo… boy yeah…" Roshi agreed. "There goes my cloud."

II

Soon Goku started to fly around on his new Kinto-un. Bardock was flying right beside him. Goku flew up ways. Down ways, upside down, right side up, in loops, and in any direction you can think of on his new cloud. Bardock was getting tired and bit dizzy from following his son in the sky. Bulma, Roshi, and Tortoise were watching them. Roshi was amazed to see a man fly. _'He couldn't be one of Crane Master's students. Perhaps he's the fellow Gohan had sent the letters about.'_ Roshi thought.

Goku came over to the land walkers and parked his cloud. Bardock landed on the land. "Wow, this is wonderful! Thank you so much!"

"This would make an excellent training wheel for Goku before he learns to fly." Bardock said.

"I've never seen anyone ride like that. " Roshi said in amazement.

Goku laughed and scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "I'll be back!" Goku called and flew off. Bardock sighed, "Too tired to follow…" He grumbled.

Bulma asked, "Mind if I ask you something; is there any way you can give me something like that too?"

Roshi turned to tortoise and asked, "Well how about it. Did this young lady help yah too?" Roshi asked.

"No, just the boy." Tortoise replied.

"All she did was whine, complain, and be bitchy to us." Bardock teased.

"Ah! What about the salt water I gave you to drink?" She scoffed

Roshi started to think "Hmm…well… there's suppose there's one way. If you get me a date with an older woman; a cutie pie like you; you can pick from my whole inventory."

Bulma and Bardock and gaped at him. Bulma gasped and blushed a bit. "But master, you should behave yourself. You should know better." Tortoise lectured.

"Oh hush up will yah! Can't a master take a break from training and have a little fun?" Roshi snapped.

"Now I know why you can't ride the Kinto-un." Turtle said bitterly.

'Oh give it a rest!" Roshi scoffed. Bulma turned around and was blushing madly. "Oh forget about the date. You happy?"

"That's better!"

'Are you still gonna give me something master Roshi?" Bulma asked.

"Yes. I'll still give you something!" he then started to think again, "Alright, let's see here." _'I could give her…no I couldn't give her that! What about the uh…'_

Bulma tilted her head and noticed the orange orb around his neck with 3 red stars on it. Bulma reached over and whispered in Bardock's ear. He grinned and nodded. Bulma rushed over and said quickly, "Never mind never mind! I know what I want!"

"You do huh? What?" Roshi asked.

"I want that! That thing that's hanging around your neck," She shouted.

Roshi pointed at his necklace, "This, this? Are you sure you want this old thing?" He asked and took it off. "I found it washed up on my island a long, long time ago."

"Oh, oh my," Bulma sighed. She took it from Roshi's hand. Bardock smirked and had a gleam in his eye. Bulma smiled and the Dragonball glowed. Goku came down with his Kinto-un; Bulma saw him and yelled, "Hey Goku, I've something to show you!"

Goku heard her and flew down. "Okay!" He called back. He flew down; Bardock put his hand on Goku's head while Bulma showed him the Dragonball.

"Look, it's another Dragonball!" She said excitedly. Goku took it in his hands and grinned very big. Bardock patted Goku's head and marveled at the orb.

"It sure is isn't it?" Bardock said. "Our fourth Dragonball!"

"A dragon-what did you call it?" Roshi asked.

"Aren't you glad we stopped and helped the tortoise now?" Goku said. "It paid off!"

"Yes I admit it. You're right Goku and Bardock. And know, just three more and its wish time!" Bulma exclaimed.

"Well know I've heard everything1" Roshi said.

Bulma took the Dragonball and gave Roshi a cute pose. "Thank you. If this Dragonball was still lost out there at sea, we might never had found it first! This is great!"

"I don't know if I want to give it up," Roshi simply said. _'Maybe that old thing is worth something after all.' _

"What do you mean old man?" Bardock yelled.

Bulma however didn't heat him. Bulma began to dance a little saying, "Its mine. I knew we could do it! Hahaha! Yay! Hahaha! Whoopee!" Bulma quickly hopped on her motorcycle, Roshi got back on tortoise's back.

The trio waved good-bye, "Good bye, and thank you!" See you later!" They called out. Bulma drove off while Bardock and Goku flew beside her.

Roshi thought, _"Maybe by giving Bulma the Dragonball, I've made the world a better place to live! Maybe not…' _

Now with the fourth Dragonball, our heroes return to the capsule house, only to make it into a capsule again and for Bulma to get changed. Goku now with his Kinto-un, he will be able to travel easier by sky with his father. Bulma had tried to ride Kinto-un but failed for her greedy desire for a boyfriend. Our heroes now drive and fly off to find the other Dragonballs before Emperor Pilaf does.

_**TBC**_


	7. Oolong the Terrible

I do not own any characters from Dragonball or Dragonball Z. They all belong to Akira Toriyama.

Goku flew along the rocky cliffs on his new Kinto-un. His father Bardock following close behind. Below, their female companion Bulma follows by motorcycle below. A hill came up Bulma accidently popped a wheeling in the air and landed. "Nice move girl!" Bardock teased.

"Oh hush!" Bulma growled. "Wait for me!" The heroic trio has already collected 4 of the magic Dragonballs. Now with only 3 more to find, so they can make their wish. Our heroes race towards the location of the 5th Dragonball; which according to Bulma's radar isn't far off. Goku made his new flying cloud do a flip while Bardock flew besides him. "Hey squirt, pay attention to where you're going. You're not invisible you know!" She shrieked at Goku. Bardock glanced at a peeved Bulma. Bulma then flew off the road and crashed her bike.

Bardock laughed heartily, "Look who's talking girl. You can't even pay attention to the road!"

"D-didn't I tell you to shut up you jerk!" Bulma yelled. Bardock snorted. The Sons flew down and saw a slightly crying Bulma; had landed on her backside.

"W-wow! Are you okay Bulma?" Goku asked sweetly.

"Ugh, does it look like I'm okay you twerp?" Bulma growled. She was wincing in pain from her crash. Bardock landed and Goku got off Kinto-un.

"I guess not…" Goku said. Bardock looked down and saw the three-star Dragonball glowing. He bent down and picked it up.

"Girl, stop you're wailing. Take a gander at this." Bardock said coolly. "The Dragonball is glowing"

Bulma immediately stopped her wailing and grabbed out of Bardock's hand. "Wow…" She said softly. "You both know what this mean don't you? The fifth ball must be really close."" Bulma said. "This is great!"

Bardock smirked and Goku turned his head. "Hey look over there. Dad, Bulma, do you see what I see." The two turned their heads and saw a small village not too far from where they were.

"Good eye son. A village!" Bardock praised.

"Do you think it's there?" Goku asked.

"Well there's only one way to find out!" Bulma said. Soon our heroes speed towards the village.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

When they arrive in the village, the trio saw it was barren. It was like a ghost town, no one was to be seen.

"I wonder where everybody is." Bardock asked. They stopped to look around. Bardock looked through most of the town and saw no one.

Bulma pulled out her dragon radar and said, "Let's see what the radar says." Goku and Bardock looked over her shoulders to see the bleeping yellow dots pointing in a direction. "Yep, there's a Dragonball here, alright." Bulma confirmed. "Hmm…something's weird here. It's too quite. Maybe this village has been deserted." Bulma said.

"No, people are here. I can feel it." Bardock said.

"Me too," Goku agreed.

"Are you both sure?" Bulma asked, "It seems like an old ghost town to me."

"That's because your senses are potent like ours" Bardock said.

"We're positive." Goku then started to explore the village for people."

"If you say so…" Bulma sighed.

"Hello in there!" Goku called out. "Come one out!"

"Yo! Come out now, we're not gonna blast yah!" Bardock yelled.

"Hello is anybody there; is anybody home?" Bulma beckoned. "Hello?' Nothing but silence. No one came out.

Bardock grunted and folded is arms. He noticed something move inside a house. 'I know I saw someone just peeking outside from that window at that house." Bardock stated pointing to a house.

"This is getting freaky," Bulma said.

"There must be some reason that they won't come out here." Bardock said.

"And I gonna find out!" Goku said sternly. He jumped off of Kinto-un and ran towards a random house, Bardock followed right next to him. On its red door it had words, "_**Sherman Priest" **_on it. Bardock knocked on the small door hard.

"Hello! I know you're in there! He yelled. He continued to knock. "Open up, hello?" Bardock was getting annoyed. He made the worst scowl Bulma has ever seen. It made him look threatening and mean.

"I hope they're not in some sort of trouble." Bulma said.

Finally annoyed, Bardock got ready to punch the door. Inside an ax was gleaming. Bardock easily punched a hole in the door. Bulma flinched a bit; that was pretty big hole.

"Oh yeah Dad! You're the best! The strongest guy I know!" Goku cheered.

"Well that did the trick." Bardock smirked. He opened the door and was the first one the step inside. Goku followed behind him.

"Ever consider using the handle?" Bulma said.

"Hey, that's the wimp's easy way…" Bardock started. The ax was lifted up and the suddenly the ax hit Bardock on the head.

"Bardock!!" Bulma shrieked.

"Daddy!!!!" Goku cried.

"Yow!" Bardock screamed. The suddenly the ax broke into little pieces. It left a potato sized bruise on Bardock's head. Bardock stepped back and little; Goku was trying to hold him up. He caught himself and placed his hand on his head and yelled, "What the hell was that for? Ow, Ow, o Ow! That really hurt man." Bulma looked and shrieked.

The man who tried to hurt Bardock was an old balding man with glasses and a mustache. He wore simple clothing and was holding the broken ax. "Oh no, it's just as I feared!" He whimpered. Behind him a little girl was peeking from behind a table. "I should've known!"

"Grr…old man what the hell did you do that for. You're gonna pay big time!" Bardock growled. He started to gather his ki slowly in his palm. Goku growled at the old man and pulled out his power pole, then went into offense mode. "That didn't tickle yah know!" Bardock growled, showing the very slow growling ki in his palm.

The old man flinched and stepped back, seeing the scary ki in a big muscular man's hand and the angry look-alike boy with a pole. He clapped his hands together into prayer position and bowed to Bardock. "Oh please forgive me Mr. Oolong. I knew it was foolish of me and try to attack you, but I rather die than lose my daughter!" The trio gave the man a confused look. The little was looking straight at them; she was a cute little girl with pigtails and a head band with a feather in it. Meanwhile the man continued to beg Bardock for forgiveness, "Oh please don't take her I'll do anything!"

"Sir, what are you talking about? My name is Bardock, not Oolong. I think you've got me mixed up with someone else," Bardock explained. The ki ball disappeared from his palm and Goku dropped his pose and jumped onto his father's shoulder.

The man stared at the trio in awe. The girl finally spoke up, "It's not him dad." Soon villagers started coming out of their homes and surrounding the trio.

II

The little girl soaked a white towel in hot water and wringed it out. "Here you go mister, this will help." The girl said sweetly and she gently placing it on a bruise. Bardock winced from the sting of it.

"C-careful, Ow!" Bardock groaned. The entire village was staring out of the door and windows, looking at Bardock and Goku and Bulma.

"What a big head!" Commented the girl.

"Ain't that the truth?' Bulma teased

"Hey!!" Bardock snapped.

"Yeah, Heh Heh!" The old man chuckled sheepishly.

"Bardock could've been killed! Shame on you!" Bulma said.

"I thought he was Oolong. I was only protecting my daughter." The man said sheepishly.

"I can understand that." Bardock said and patted Goku's head.

Goku looked at the girl and asked "Does that me you're a girl?" The girl giggled at his foolishness. Goku then started patting the girl's crotch. Bardock fell over anime style.

"Yeah thought so, you're a girl alright!" Goku giggled. The girl was blushing madly and had a nervous look on her face.

"Gah, Goku don't do that!" Bardock yelped.

Bulma stepped over bonked Goku on the head. "Ow! What'd you do that for?"

'Guess Einstein!" Bulma yelled, her face was red. Goku gave her a confused look and Bardock slapped his forehead. Bulma turned to the old man and asked, "So what does this Oolong person that makes everybody afraid of him?"

The girl, her father, and the villagers all gasped and stared in shock and awe. The girl ran over to her father and hugged him, starting to sob in his clothes. The man replied "He's our worst nightmare. He's a blackness descended on our village. A monster who treats us like his toys,"

"Sounds like one bad guy," commented Bardock.

"That bad?" Bulma said

"Much worst!" The old man yelped.

"How so?" she asked.

"Well somehow this terrible creature had the power to change into any shape it wants to." He described attacks of monsters that destroyed their village. "Instead of one nightmare, we're cursed by many. No one knows his real identity, we just know he want our daughters. That monster had already kidnapped 3 girls from the village already!" The trio looked at each other. "And yesterday my darkest fears came true. He wants my daughter, Pocowatha…" He shivered at a memory of Oolong saying he was going take his daughter away to marry her.

. Bardock spoke up, "Well I think it's despicable this shape-shifter is stealing innocent girls."

"Bully! Maybe we could trap him when he comes back again." Goku suggested. Bardock gave him a look in surprise.

"That's actually not a bad idea…" Bardock said.

"How're going to do that? He's bigger than this house!" The old man cried, "My word, you don't get it do you? Oolong would squish you both like little bugs!" There's no way to this monster"

"I highly doubt I'd be squished that easily." Bardock said confidently. He looked and saw the villagers staring and gaping at them.

"So tell us, why have you three come here anyway?" The Sherman priest asked.

"I'll show you!" Bulma said. She pulled off her backpack and pulled out a Dragonball. "You see, we came to find a ball that matches this one." She gave it to the priest, and he inspected it.

"Strange…yes it's very beautiful but I've never seen anything like it." The old man stated.

"Well I have!" and old woman from the village said. She stepped in and said, "Young lady, I have a matching one."

"I knew there was one here!" Bulma cheered. Bardock smirked.

'Well what do you know, how 'bout that?" The old man sighed.

"Can I see it please," Bulma asked the old woman.

She nodded and dug into her apron pocket. She pulled out an orange orb with red stars on it and said," Here it is," She showed it to the trio.

"Yeah, the six-star ball!" Bulma cheered.

"Wow!" Goku chirped.

"Cool!" Bardock said coolly.

"Can you give it to us?" Goku asked.

"I'm not giving this ball away. It's been in my family for generations!" The old woman said.

Bulma smirked and replied, "Would you give it to us if we can get rid of that Oolong creep, get the girls back, and return your village to being a peaceful place again?"

The man, old woman, and the villagers all gasped, whispered, and gaped at the trio. 'By yourselves?" The Sherman priest gasped.

"Now listen, I may be old but I'm not gullible. How could the three of you defeat Oolong?" The old woman asked.

Bulma boasted proudly, "Well Goku, Bardock, and I are quite a team mam. Right?" She turned and saw Goku patting the old woman's crotch and Bardock raiding food from the fridge. Bulma fell over anime style and Bardock laughed with food in his mouth.

"So you're a girl aren't you?" Goku chirped.

"What a randy boy!" The old woman blushed.

Bulma ran over bopped Goku on the head again. "Are you crazy? Please stop doing that!" Bulma snapped. Bardock waltzed over with a chicken leg bone in his mouth.

'Do you think, you and those two guys have a chance to beat Oolong miss?" A village man asked.

"Yeah I think we have a good chance," Bulma said positively, "Bardock is very strong and he can fly! Goku's a little on a puny side, but he packs a wallop! Don't 'cha kid?" Goku grumbled a bit. Bardock rolled his eyes and rubbing gnawing on the chicken bone."I'm Bulma; I'm the brains of the outfit."

"Yeah, but you barely use them." Bardock murmured softly for only Goku to hear. Goku sniggered.

"Would you forgive me for hitting you Bardock? We'd appreciate your help." The Sherman priest said.

"Sure why not?" Bardock said lazily as he spat out the chicken bone.

"There's a legend that speaks of a boy who will come and liberate our people. But we are always thought it was folklore." The village man said. The old woman nodded.

"Bulma, it would be the answer to all my prayers if you bring my baby back," A woman said.

A man that looked like an Indian ran up to Goku, grabbed his hands and bowed "You have my blessing young warrior. Your courage stands tall like a great monument before my people."

Bardock smirked, _'That's more like it. Pretty soon the entire universe will be doing that to you Kakarot.' _He thought

Bulma grinned and said, "I just thought of a great way to trap Oolong.

III

Goku stepped out, he was now in Pocowatha's dress, and also wore a pink polka-dot bandana over his head, covering his hair.

"Alright, you look great kid! It'd be better if you smiled a bit more." Bulma said.

Bardock didn't know whether to crack up about this or to feel shame or to feel pity for his son. He placed his hand over his forehead; a major head-ache was coming on. "Argh, this is no way for a warrior to dress. This will absolutely not work." He saw stifling a few giggles.

"This is not something to smile about. Can we come up with a different plan Bulma?" Goku grumbled.

"Sorry, no time kid," Bulma said sweetly.

"Gosh Goku, you make a real pretty girl," Pocowatha said politely.

"He looks like my messed up daughter I never had," Bardock added. Goku growled a bit.

"Now remember Goku, don't blow your cover. He has to think your Pocowatha." Bulma explained. "The important thing is to find out where is keeping the other girls. After that, you and Bardock can handle it whatever you both want to."

"I still think it won't work…" Bardock grumbled.

"Alright, alright I'll do it!" Goku snapped. 'But I'm not gonna like it this one little bit!" Suddenly a loud stomping crashing noise was heard. Bardock looked up and saw the light bulb on the ceiling swinging around.

"It's Oolong!" The Sherman priest cried. "He's coming!" Bulma started screaming and the villagers panicked.

III

Outside coming into the village was a red ogre monster in a white suit with flowing in one hand. Oolong crashed through the village's sigh without care; the villager panicked and ran around to their homes. Step by giant crushing step, Oolong neared.

"He's coming! Oolong's in the village and he's on his way here!" A man shouted to the trio.

'Good work! Now try to make sure everyone gets into the houses safely," Bulma ordered. The man nodded and ran off. Goku walked out with Bardock behind him. "Okay, it's up to you. Good luck." She cheered.

"Well since you're the brains of this outfit, you're going to help him right?" Bardock asked.

"Yeah, are you gonna help me Bulma?" Goku inquired. Bulma said nothing just pushed Goku farther out from the house. Bardock and Bulma went back into the house and shut the door, watching him through hole in the doorknob.

"I'll be right here rooting for you Goku!" Bulma said positively.

"Oh, that helps my son a lot!" Bardock said sarcastically. "Alright son, it's show time! Don't let him get a good look at your face and remember, smile!" trying to soothe him positively.

Goku grumbled, "Argh, next time, I'm making the plan…" Goku turned his back to Oolong as he came over.

The giant Oolong came closer with a grin on his face. His black hair was done nicely. "I've come for you my little buttercup. I've brought you some flowers. "I hope you like them sweetheart," Oolong roared presenting the pink flowers to Goku. Bardock was already getting sick just looking at this scene.

Goku cleared his throat and made his voice high-pitched. "Oh I-I l-love flowers," Goku said softly.

Oolong noticed the power pole on Goku's back. "Huh…that's your rolling pin?" Oolong asked.

Bulma flinched a little. "I told you this wouldn't work. He's getting suspicious." Bardock sighed.

"And I see you've put on a little weight." Oolong added,

"Y-yeah well uh…look who's talking!" Goku shot back quietly.

"You scamp!" Oolong teased. "A little feisty today aren't we?"

"Argh Bardock, didn't you teach Goku some manners? Goku, where'd you learn how to act?" Bulma yelled softly to Bardock.

"Manners never came first to my mind when teaching him," Bardock said idly, "And I never really taught him how to act well."

"He's gonna blow this thing big time if he doesn't shape up!" Bulma reminded Bardock.

Oolong smiled and gave Goku the "rock on" hand sign. "That's good. I like 'em feisty. I wouldn't change anything 'bout you, except about that ugly scarf."

Goku then started to tremble a bit. _'Uh oh_.' He thought

"Oh my, you're trembling!" Oolong said.

'_That's because I need to use the bathroom real bad!' _

"You're scared! Well I get my feelings hurt when girls are scared of me," Oolong bellowed.

Bulma started to panic. This weren't going well. Bardock peered over to see what was going on. It wasn't normal for Kakarot to tremble…unless…_'Oh no. This cannot be good!"_

"Well that's it!" Oolong growled. H let out a big roar. Them a big BOMB! happened. His body enveloped in smoke. Bulma clenched her teeth, Bardock held his breath for a moment. The Sherman priest and his daughter trembled in fear. The smoke cleared revealing a handsome man with a fancy mustache and suit; he seemed to sparkle. Goku glanced a bit and saw the man. The man bowed a bit and said "What do you think of this? Suave, debonair, handsome? If you don't like it I can always change into something else. "

Goku didn't know what to say. He giggled sheepishly. Bulma stepped out of the house with heart in her eyes and a bit of drool coming out of the corner of her mouth, she giggled dreamily. Bardock smack his head and grumbled to himself, "She's gonna ruin everything! Doesn't she know that's an evil monster in disguise! Females and their romantic fantasies!"

The man looked up at Bulma. Bulma giggled, she emitted hearts everywhere. "Why hello there stranger, my name's Bulma. I don't think we've met!" she swooned. Goku and Bardock fell over.

"My can such beauty be real? Oolong said. "You must be a dream."

Bulma blushed; she took off her coat and flashed her shirt covered breasts to him. "Nope, I'm all woman!" Bardock wanted to strange Bulma right now.

Oolong blushed. He waved his hand in "Puff Puff" position. _'Imagine if I had a woman like that.'_ He could just see himself playing with her breasts. **(A/N: Eww! B/V forever!)** _'Yes, she's a delicious catch I've ever saw. Oh, but what about Pocowatha? _

"So…uh…when are you gonna kidnap me and take me away?" Bulma asked cutely. He eyes sparkled and heart danced around her head.

'_Oh, I can't just leave Pocowatha. But I'd be crazy to refuse a girl like that!'_ Oolong sighed. _'Pocowatha or the new girl? Pocowatha or the new girl? Pocowatha or…huh?' _he recited in his head. He looked around, _'Where'd she go?' _Oolong turned his head and saw Goku peeing on a tree. _'What? Am I seeing what I think I'm seeing?" _He stomped over to take a better look. _'This must be some mistake! It can't be!' _

He looked and saw his well…you-know-what. He gasped and was drawn aback. Oolong screamed in fear and shock. Bardock slapped his forehead.

"Ahhh! I've been deceived; you're not Pocowatha!" Oolong screamed. His teeth became fangs and hair stood up on end.

Goku asked, "Huh…? What gave me away? It was my tail wasn't it?" Bardock fell over anime style. _'So much for that plan.'_ Bardock thought. He stepped out of the house, scowled at a glancing Oolong, and folded his arms carelessly.

Oolong was furious. His teeth were fangs, his eyes glowed red and darkness swirled around them. His voice boomed, "If there is one thing I cannot tolerate, it is deception!!" Bulma stared at Oolong. With a giant BAKOOM!! Oolong disappeared in a puff of smoke. In its place was a red eyed giant bull. The bull cackled evilly.

"Man, that's one big cow…" Goku stated. Bardock stepped next to Goku, glaring eye to eye with the bull.

"I am not a cow, I am a bull! Can't you tell the difference? And I'm a pretty mean one too." The bull said; somehow the bull had a Spanish accent.

Bulma continued to stare at Oolong. Bulma shrieked, "Whoa, what happened to my polite handsome definite man in the really expensive trench coat?" Bulma stepped back into the house slowly. Bardock rolled his eyes, _"Cowardly girl. Comes out when a handsome guy appears leaves when a bull appears.'_

Inside the house Bulma laid her back on the wall. "This is just too weird."

The Sherman priest mourned, "That monstrous beast deceit you too. He fools you by changing into the one thing you want most; and in your case that's a man. You should be ashamed of yourself!" He scolded Bulma. Bulma twitched a little. She felt so stupid right now. "The good thing is don't think he want to marry Pocowatha anymore. He wants to marry you instead."

"You'll make a nice bride Bulma," Pocowatha said positively.

"What kind of a girl you think I am? I'm not getting married to a bull! And that's that!" Bulma shrieked.

III

Outside Oolong, Goku, and Bardock were having a stare down. Bardock and Oolong glared at each other. Oolong cackled a bit, thinking victory was at hand…or hoofs in that matter. Bulma peered through the hole in the door and yelled out, "Bardock, Goku the plans on you two. It's time to take the bull by the horns!"

"That was a lame pun girl," Bardock joked.

"Shut up already! Don't forget to find out where the girls are, and stay alive okay?" Bulma shrieked.

Goku took off Pocowatha's dress and the scarf, revealing the gi underneath and his spiky messy hair. He and his father got into offense positions. Goku took of his pole and Bardock tied his scarlet headband tightly around his head. "Hah, now we'll see just how tough you really are!" Bardock smirked. 'Show us everything you got bull-crap."

That just made Oolong angrier. "Say your prays senior and chico; here I come. Hahaha" He cackled. "You've reached end of the road there muchacho." Goku was stretching his joints while Bardock glared meanly at the bull.

"Smile!" Goku teased. He pulled down an eye-lid, stuck out his tongue and blew a raspberry. Bardock smirked and chuckled at his son's taunting.

Oolong stomped his giant hoofs. 'What are you loco kid? There's still a way save your sorry assess. Get me the senorita."

"I can't help to see I'm already staring at a sorry ass right now." Bardock said. The bull growled intensely.

"You'll pay for that one senior!" Oolong yelled.

"Forget it bully! My dad's the strongest man ever! And I'm going to be the strongest in the universe. Come let's go, we can take you on just fine!" Goku threatened.

"Alrighty, so be it! A little monkey boy burrito and monkey old man enchilada might hit the spot. Sounds yummy!" The bull snarled.

"Look, you can't scare us like you scared everyone else! I'm not buying it bull-shit." Bardock growled. Goku pulled out his power pole and Bardock cracked his knuckles menacingly.

"Why you crazy old man! You're both little cucarachas, one with a stick, and I'm a gigantic bull!" Oolong yelled. Bardock noticed Oolong was sweating a little.

"I don't care what you are. Give those girls back!" Bardock announced coolly.

Oolong growled. He glanced at a nearby clock and saw what time it was. "Uh, I will be back!" Oolong yelped. The bull then started to run away.

"Hey come back here you cowardly bull-crap!" Bardock yelled. Goku and Bardock ran after him.

'Hey come back here and fight! Where are you going?" Goku yelled. Oolong was running as fast as he can. Oolong soon ran out off the village; Goku and Bardock in his tail.

Oolong turned when going out the gate. Behind the gate wall a puff of smoke was seen. By the time the Sons came out and looked around. Behind the wall was a little pig man in a green suit and green paper-boy hat whistling innocently.

"Hey pig, a giant bull came through here. Have you seen it went?" Bardock asked.

The pig man turned and answered, "He went that way." He pointed to the right direction.

"Ha-ha!" Goku said in triumph and the duo ran in that direction.

When the Sons were out of sight and chuckled and said quietly to himself, "Heh, those idiots. They'll never know this is bonified 100% real me. I'm the most unsuspecting thing. I've always wondered why a good looking guy like me can't get chicks, so I used my transformation powers. Good thing I went to transformation school. The only problem is that I can only hold a transformation for about 5 minutes before changing back to normal."

III

"They chased Oolong of the village, "the Sherman priest said. "

"I saw Goku and Bardock got after him." Bulma added.

Remarkable! What an extraordinary family!" he exclaimed.

"Yeah, those two lunk-heads will chase him 100 miles if they have too," Bulma commented.

"Wow, maybe it's the legend after all…"

IIIII

"Hey, Yo Oolong! We know you're out there! You can't hide forever!" Bardock shouted. He and Goku were heading back to the village.

"Couldn't find him huh," The real Oolong said idly.

"Uh-uh," Goku said sadly. Oolong smirked and snickered slyly.

"Hey everybody, he ran away!" Goku yelled to the village.

"That coward might just be hiding so stay away until we find him," Bardock added,

Oolong smirked and checked his watch. '_All right here we go again. But I better watch, these to muscle-heads could ruin a good thing. If I want to keep these simpletons in line, I better come up with something really fierce and menacing.'_ Oolong then walked and peeked from the gates. "Wait, I know a good one." He said to himself. "Yeah this'll scare out of their pants."

II

"Hmm…I guess he is gone Dad," Goku sighed.

"Too bad, I was really looking forward to fight a shape-shifter." Bardock sighed as well. Oolong then transformed. "Huh, what was that?" Bardock asked.

The Sons turned and saw Oolong as a giant robot strangely with a bowl of broth in his hand with chopsticks. **(A/N: Hey, don't look at me I don't write this stuff.)** "Looking for me you two idiots, Hahaha! Do you really think I would run away?" Oolong boomed. The duo stared at Oolong. "You both seem a bit timid this time. Well you're both lucky to over muscled baboons, I'm feeling generous." He placed his chopstick on the bowl. "I was going to dunk you in this hot broth and eat you both like dumplings. But if you both leave town now, I will spare you."

"I think I'll pass thank you, how about son?" Bardock asked coolly.

"Me too. But after this, I'm in the mood for dumplings for dinner. I am going to stay so go ahead and he me if you can." Goku said.

"If I can? How dare y-oh!" Oolong accidently spilled some broth on his thumb and winced in pain. "Look what'd made do you little brat." Oolong growled.

"What're talking about? I didn't make you do anything," Goku said innocently.

"Alright that does it! Your times run out you little runt. I was going to let you go because you both are not like the other cowards, but I now I have no choice but to destroy all-argh!" Oolong yelped. A little boy from behind had used his sling-shot and hit Oolong on the back of his head with a rock. "Ow, Ow, Ow, Ow!" The mother of the boy raced out and grabbed the boy before he was killed.

"You know you got a real little monster on your hand lady!" Oolong screamed. That made the woman jump. "Geez, kids these days. Now where were we?"

"You were just saying you were going to destroy us, but I highly doubt it." Bardock said.

"Oh yeah, yeah right! Thanks man."

"You what though, I don't think you are as strong as you say you are"

"Listen here I'm the fiercest most impolite warrior on the face of the Earth!"

Bardock smirked and went into his pants pocket. "Oh yeah let's see about that." He pulled out green screen scouter and placed over his eye. He press a button and numbers appeared. "Feh, according to my scouter you have a mere power-level of 4. You are pathetic."

"What how dare you. I think you need to get glasses for both eyes!" Oolong ranted.

"See for yourself Goku," Bardock said; he went back into his pocket and pulled out a smaller version of his scouter. He tossed it to Goku and Goku put it on. Goku pressed a button and laughed. "You right dad he's a weakling!" That made Oolong angrier.

Bulma was peeking and saw the scouters on them. _'Note to self: Ask Bardock and Goku about those eye pieces.'_

"Well what make you think that you both are a match for me?" Oolong thundered.

"Because I am a full-blooded saiyain warrior. Also I learned martial arts from my Grandpa," Goku said simply.

"Saiyain, what the hell is a saiyain? If you do know martial arts, I bet you can break these brick with your bare hands." Oolong challenged and stacking some bricks in a pile in front of Goku.

"Oh yeah, well I can break them apart with one finger watch me!" Goku chirped. He raised his index finger and crashed it into the bricks, breaking them into little pieces.

"And we can break more than bricks." Bardock said evilly in a deadly tone. Oolong flinched in fear. Then in another puff of smoke the giant robot transform into a giant bat. "Later suckers!" and the bat flew away.

Bulma bursted out of the house and screamed, "Hey you both can fly can't you? Go after him so you can find the girls."

"Oh you're right…KINTO-UN!!" Goku called. The flying cloud came and Goku jumped on. Bardock flew up into the air and followed the after the bat.

"Amazing it's our legend that an evil monster would be topple over by a mere boy who dances on clouds and his father who walks on air." The Sherman priest said.

The Sons followed after Oolong bat; passing cliff canyons. When Oolong saw Goku and Bardock gaining on him by sky, he transformed into a rocket and blasted off. The duo gained their velocity. It became a race through the skies. They were neck in neck, Oolong trying to escape. He was getting a bit tired from flying so fast. They soon shot up higher to the cloud where they were above it. They zigzagged, went up and down, left and right, and any direction you can think of. _'Oh no my five minutes are up!'_ Oolong realized his time was up. In a puff of smoke Oolong transformed back into his true form; a pig man. Oolong then began to fall down due to gravity of course. "Ah, I'm not ready to die!" oolong screamed

"That's because you haven't been beaten to a bloody pulp…yet… "Bardock said slowly. Bardock raced down and grabbed Oolong's hand.

'Who the heck are you, my physiatrist?" oolong said sarcastically.

IIIIIIII

Bardock, Goku, and real Oolong returned to the village. Oolong was forced to tell the truth about everything.

"Well now piggy, what do you have to say for yourself?" Bulma asked.

"An apology would be nice, "Goku said.

Oolong looked down and said quickly "Alright I'm sorry. Happy now?"

"Yes, yes we are. You're lucky Bulma stopped me from making you into bacon." Bardock snorted.

"I can't believe we were scared by a pig," An old man said.

"Now where are my granddaughter and the rest of the girls?" The old woman with the Dragonball demanded.

"They're home…" Oolong said sheepishly.

"What home? " A man asked.

"Look pal, your reign of terror is over. Now tell us or else, "Bulma threatened.

"Girl, you're really brave now that Oolong's all tied up." Bardock commented.

"Oh quiet you. And stop calling me girl, I'm a beautiful young woman named Bulma!" Bulma shrieked.

IIII

Soon Oolong began to lead the trio and the villagers to his home. Oolong glanced a little.

"Hey if you planning on turning into a bug, I'll squash yah, "Goku threatened.

Oolong groaned and blushed from embarrassment.

"Where exactly is this shack of yours? Sherman priest asked.

"Is it far?" Pocowatha asked.

"Here my little 'shack'" Oolong said idly. Everyone gaped, it was a giant manor.

"Awesome…" Bulma said. "You don't see houses every day, what a palace!"

"Sweet pad you got there." Bardock complimented.

"How'd you get such a big place?" Goku asked.

Oolong smirked and said, "Well it wasn't easy kiddo. I had to rip off a lot of people."

"And you're proud of that?" Goku barked.

Soon the parents started rushing in for their daughters. They ran through the beautiful marble halls and looked through price-less rooms. By the time they found their daughters, they were all relaxing. One daughter was in a fine movie-star dress sipping iced tea, one was stretching for aerobics, and another was making herself a snack.

"Daughter?" One father asked dumbfounded.

"Oh, hi daddy." The girl doing aerobics said without interest.

"Sorry I didn't write mommy, I've been super busy." The movie-star girl said idly.

"Me too," The other girls agreed. When the trio and Oolong came in they gasped at the sight.

"Hi girls," Oolong greeted.

"Oh hi snookums. Oh before I forget, I'm totally out of pink lipstick and pink nail-polish. And I need a new hair-dryer." The aerobics girl said. The parents and the trio were all glaring and them Oolong who was shamefully staring down at his own feet.

"I was hoping these girls would cook and take care of my house, all they want to do is lay around. Take them please!" Oolong begged.

"Sounds a lot like my wife," Bardock said in a daze.

The old woman smiled, "Well this belongs to you young lady and those two nice young men," She gave Bulma her Dragonball.

"Oh, you made out day!" Bulma cheered. The orb started shimmer a bit. _'Just two more to go and then and then I can call the dragon to make my wish.' _

_**TBC**_


	8. Yamcha the Desert Bandit Pt1

I do not own any characters from Dragonball or Dragonball Z. They all belong to Akira Toriyama.

With only 2 more Dragonballs left to find, our heroes Goku, Bardock, and Bulma are heading into very dangerous territory as they continue their search. Joining them in their quest is Oolong; the perverse pig that can change his appearance at will. They now speed along a long river by speed boat. "Ugh I think I'm getting seasick." Bardock groaned before harshly vomiting off the end.

"Hey watch where you hurl, this is a new boat." Bulma scolded. "Anyway, it was a good idea to travel down this river Bardock, we're making awesome time!"

"That's great but why is Oolong coming along?" Goku asked.

"Well personally I think she has a 'thing' for me kid," Oolong replied.

"Oh yeah dream on swine, why don't you head back to your farm and cool down in some mud!" Bardock snorted before vomiting again.

Goku rolled his eyes and told his father "Oh boy, I knew you shouldn't have eaten that month old ham sandwich."

"I find that a bit stereo-typing!" Oolong snapped. "And disgusting."

"I thought Oolong's transforming power might come in handy in later situations," Bulma said.

"Oh" The Sons chorused.

"Hey whaddya mean? Are you saying I'm not yah type" Oolong yelled.

"Exactly, I'm looking for tall, dark, and handsome. Someone kinda like Bardock, only less mean, rude, and arrogant."

"Oi!" Bardock yelled blushed a bit. "You ain't my type neither sweetie"

"Just give it time honey. I'm the man," Oolong said lazily. At that time Goku patted Oolong crotch. Bardock slapped his forehead while Oolong snapped, "Hey back off kid, and I ain't that kind of pig!"

Goku just pointed, "You are right you are a man!"

"Of course I'm a man you imbecile! What more do yah want? I'll take a poly-graph, a blood sample; just don't ever touch me there again!" He shoved Goku a bit and Goku was trying to balance himself not to fall off. Bardock just chuckled sheepishly and scratched the back of his head, "Sorry…"

IIIII

The group continued to speed along the river. "Hey Bulma; how much further? Dad can't hold on anymore before he pukes his guts out!" Goku asked patting his father's back. Bardock was mumbling "My poor stomach, my poor stomach…"

"Well we should almost there by now. Bardock you have to hold on a bit." She reached into her bag and pulled out a map. "This map should tell us where we are."

"We've been driving forever already. Where in the world are we going?" Oolong asked.

Bulma checked her map and replied, we're going to a place call Fry-Pan Mountain."

"Fry-Pan Mountain? Never heard of it" Bardock said idly. He looked at Oolong who seemed to be panicking. Oolong screamed, "FRY-PAN MOUNTAIN? ARE YOU CRAZY? THERE'S NO WAY IN HELL YOU'RE DRAGGING ME DOWN THERE!!!

"What's so scary about a mountain?" Goku asked innocently.

"For starters the place is always on fire and it's the home of the terrible Ox-King! Do you understand now?"

"That bad huh?" Goku simply said.

"Ox-king? Who's the Ox-King?" Bardock asked.

"Relax Oolong; Goku and Bardock are both strong enough to take down some old ox." Bulma said reassuringly.

"Yeah the girl is right,"

"I hear the Ox-King is the strongest guy in the whole world! They say he's over 10 ft tall and weighs 500 pounds. And he's always on the prowl for people who climb up the mountain and try to steal his treasure. He carries a giant battle ax and let me tell you he knows how to use it too! He's been terrorizing the countryside for years and they say if you meet Ox-King there is only one thing you can do, run! Cause if he catches you gets a **really **close shave" Oolong said darkly.

"Oooo, he sounds terrifying." Bardock said sarcastically.

"Don't joke about this; this is nothing to laugh about! It's true!" Oolong said.

"Y-you really heard that?" Bulma asked timidly. Oolong nodded.

"Sounds like the guy's not very happy," Goku concluded.

"Exactly, he's radically unhappy!" With that he jumped and transformed into a fish. "Well I'm outta here!" he said and splashed into the river.

"Just great, that coward just swam away. C'mon son let's go get him" Bardock sighed and he and Goku began to undress,

"Don't worry Bulma; we'll get 'em." Goku said. When finally when they were both naked **(A/N: Naked Bardock…*drools*)** they dived into the river. They swam before Goku pointing out fish Oolong hiding in a school of fish. Oolong saw the two coming and he immediately broke for it.

"These two are crazy!" Oolong growled and swam off.

"I don't see him anywhere Dad." Goku said.

"Me neither." Bardock sighed. "Where'd that pig fish go?" They looked around for a bit. Oolong was hiding low beneath them on the river ground. The two gave up on their search and swam back up for air. "We lost him Bulma" Bardock said.

"Well if you wanna catch a fish, you need the right kind of bait."

"Bait?"

"Like this," Bulma said proudly pulling out some panties hooked on a rod.

"Uh…you're going to use your panties as bait…why?" Bardock asked blandly as they got back on the boat.

"Do yah think he'll bite?" Goku asked.

"If I know Oolong, he will." Bulma said confidently. She then casted the panties a line. They waited for a second until, "I think I got a nibble," She pulled up. Fish Oolong had the panties in his mouth. "Yeah! Grab 'em boys!" Bardock grabbed the struggling fish tightly, making sure he didn't slip away.

"Hey whaddya know, he actually bit her panties," Bardock smirked, "A true sleaze."

IIIII

"If you try that fish stuff again, at least we know what's for lunch," Goku threatened, he even had a knife and a fork in his hands.

"Alright, you win. I'll go to Fry-Pan Mountain." Oolong grumbled.

"Here take this special vitamin," Bulma offered, handing Oolong a piece of candy. "It'll fill you up, and give you strength. It's made from uh…all natural ingredients. It's very good for you"

Oolong took the candy and looked at it, "Doesn't look like much, but I'll try it," He popped it into his mouth. "I just hope you health nuts don't eat pork." Bulma smirked devilishly. Bardock looked at her, _'Now what's she up to now?'_

"Hey Bulma, can I have a one too?" Goku asked innocently again.

"Sorry all out"

"See kid, it's my hoggish allure. I'm not your average pig, chicks dig me. Oolong bragged.

Bardock rolled his eyes just, then the boat shook and stop. "Hey what's going on, the boat stopped!"

"That's great we're out of gas!" Bulma groaned.

"I get gas sometimes after I eat," Goku commented.

"Well don't suppose you have an extra emergency tank of gas on you?" Bardock questioned.

"No. Hey Oolong, can you change into a tank of gas?" Bulma asked.

"Sorry, against union rules honey. Besides, I get all used up!" Oolong pouted.

"How about an oar then?"

"I'd be honored to be eheh…**handled** by a girl like you Bulma"

Bardock barked," Just change into a stinking oar already you stupid perverted pig." Oolong jumped and changed into an oar. Bulma handed him to Bardock and Bardock began to paddle. Oolong kept on getting water in his face. "I also hope you drown during this pig." Bardock snickered evilly.

"Hey watch the water in the mouth you muscle-bound monster!" Oolong spluttered as they paddled to shore.

IIII

Once they got to land, Bardock tied up the boat to a stump. "I gotta go Bulma!" Goku called out to Bulma.

"Alright, just be quick about it!" Goku rushed over to the lake and well…did his business; right in front of the others.

"Really son? There's a bush right there!" Goku scolded while helping Bulma off the boat.

"Well, too bad. Looks like we can't make it to Fry-Pan Mountain." Oolong said quickly.

"Not so fast boys. I still have some capsules left," Bulma smiled reaching into her jacket. She stopped her eyes wide. Bardock looked at her with a puzzled expression. "M-my capsules…The-there missing…" she breathed. Bulma screamed to the top of her lungs that even the great third-rank sayain commander Bardock cringed at, his fingers in his ears. "AHHH! WE'RE TRAPPED IN A WASTE-LAND WITH NO WAY TO GET OUT!" She screeched. Bulma ran over to Oolong and bellowed, "You stole our capsules didn't, you little porker!"

"Hey, did not! Don't blame this on me!" Oolong snapped.

"Stop your screeching girl, we'll manage somehow." Bardock growled.

"Yeah, what's so bad about walking?" Goku said. 'Why are freaking out?"

Bulma screamed again fell to her knees. "You both don't understand. Without those capsules, we don't have any shelter, or food, or water, or transportation, or anything!" She cried. "We can't get out!"

"Ever heard of living off the land?" Bardock grumbled. He sighed, women…no matter wherever in the universe, women always needed their luxuries. He just couldn't get that.

"Shut up, I never lived in the armpit of the world like you two! I don't know how to survive!"

"Why can't you just walk Bulma?" Goku asked.

"That's easy for you both to say. You have a flying cloud and Bardock knows how to fly! I can't fly!" Bulma shrieked. No one had noticed that Oolong was sneaking away. He wasn't about to let these nimrods drag him to Fry-Pan Mountain and to his death.

"Just have the pig change into of them motor bikes. Then you can ride him out of here." Bardock suggested.

"Oh that's a great idea Bardock! I'm so glad **I **thought of it!" Bulma exclaimed. Bardock just rolled his eyes. She turned and said very sweet sing-song voice, "Oh Oolong dear! ~" Then she saw it, Oolong was gone! She shrieked, "Argh, he ditched us!"

Bardock sighed, "Don't worry we'll find him." The two then went out to search for Oolong. Bardock took the land while Goku did the sky. They tried to sense out his weak power level. Oolong was cleverly hiding behind a rock. The sayains gave up the search for the shape-shifter, their efforts fruitless. "He's gone girl." Bardock reported. "His power is as low as an insect's it blends in."

Bulma smirked and began to whistle, "Swee, swee, swee!" Oolong from his hiding place felt a strangeness in his body. He got that horrible feeling like what you get from eating too much chili and beans and stuff like that. Yeah you know the _runs_. He ran to the nearest bush and well, let's just said it all flowed out. Bulma called out, "Hey Oolong, what's the matter little piggy? You know that vitamin I gave you; it's actually a lax pill that gives you the runs whenever someone whistles! You're not going anywhere!"

Bardock smirked, "Very clever girl. That was almost devious." Then he began to laugh at the poor pig's running pain.

Oolong however didn't find the humor in all this. "That's perfect…" Oolong grumbled.

"Huh…guess I got you under my amazing power now huh? Swee swee swee" Bulma whistled. At this point, Goku took out his pole and jumped impressively and landed far away, getting battle ready. Bulma turned and gave Goku a quizzical stare. Goku pointed at her and growled, "I knew it you are a witch! You've put Oolong under a spell!"

Bardock clonked him on the head, "You doofus, it's a figure of speech."

Bulma smiled, "Yeah If I were a witch, I wouldn't need the Dragonballs to grant my wish. That pill was a little bit of science to control-"

"Cheap shot!" Oolong interrupted. The pig walked out of a bush with a roll of toilet paper in his hand. He was panting heavily and looking very foolish.

"So I trust my little pill will keep you in line." Bulma smirked in victory.

"Yes mam" Oolong sighed in defeat. Bardock sneered and looked at Bulma with a new admiration. For a weak whiney human female, she was pretty clever and devious.

"Let me try!" Goku chirped. Goku whistled, "Swee swee swee!" Oolong stopped in his tracks and tingled all over. He then ran to the bush. Bardock smirked and whistled along with Goku. "Swee swee swee!" Bulma just laughed and the pig's torture. Goku laughed as well clamping his nose from the smell.

"I'll get you all for this!" Oolong barked.

"Well that's enough fooling around. I need my motorcycle now Oolong!" demanded Bulma. Oolong grumbled some cursed under his breath and with a big BOM! He transformed into a small child's electric scooter. Bulma just stared and complained, "I asked for a motorbike not a motor-dork! This is too small for me Oolong." She sighed, "Oh well let's go" She sat on Oolong and let's just say he crumbled under her weight **(A/N: I ain't saying Bulma's fat!) **

"Damnit! Can't you do anything right you pork chop! Now what do we do now?" Bulma scolded.

Oolong groaned, "Look you uncute Amazon, you think its fun being squash to the ground under your fat ass!" Oolong changed back. "Since you can't ride me…" Oolong transformed into a pink panty. "…you can wear me. C'mon try me on try me on!"

This pissed Bulma off to no ends. "YOU PERVERT!!" she screeched. She slapped Oolong straight to the ground. Bardock winced and chuckled nervously _'That has got to leave mark. He really did deserve it' _

Goku suggested, "Next time maybe you should try being her hat."

"Shu-shut up Goku…" Oolong groaned out

IIIIIIIIIII

Continuing their journey on foot, Bulma, Bardock, Oolong, and Goku press on into the unknown, uncharted, unexplored…and uncool desert wastelands. Bulma and Oolong were panting like dogs, sweating up a storm, and dragging themselves along with walking sticks. Goku and Bardock seemed unaffected by the heat and was walking straight ahead of them. "You lazy bums. This is nothing compared to the deserts of Destoria 6. That's the hottest desert in the entire universe. I and my men were on the brink of dying of thirst, but we survived." Bardock snorted.

"Yeah, I even gave up riding my cloud to make it fair for you guys. Now try to keep up." Goku added.

"Just remember Goku, you're not a city kid like us. You're both used to the wilderness, but I'm not! I should be pampered! My God look at this place!" Bulma looked around. Nothing but sand and desert plants and rocks. No sign of civilization or anything close to it.

"Yeah something not right…I'm getting the feeling we're being watched by someone…or something," Bardock said darkly.

"Well it's giving me the creeps!" Oolong squealed.

Bulma through down her stick and plopped down on her butt. "Ah I can't stand it! I'm going crazy!"

"You are giving up already Bulma?" Goku asked.

"N-no…y-yes…maybe I don't know!" Bulma mumbled. Then she began thrashing about crying, "I want a bath, I need air conditioning I don't want to be stranded here in the desert without a boyfriend or my capsules!" She was flailing her back into the shade of a large rock.

"Behold son…the true nature of the female species." Bardock said idly. _'She make Prince Vegeta almost look good, almost. I remember my wife being as difficult as the girl' _

"Her self-centerness even inspires me," Oolong commented.

"You and Bulma sure are strange Oolong." Goku said.

Bulma sighed in relief of the shade. "Ah…shade. Sleepy…Naptime" Bulma dozed off into a nap.

Bardock lied down and picked a piece of dried grass and placed the end tip in his mouth like a toothpick coolly. "I say we rest here and let the princess get her beauty rest."

"For once I'm with you Bardock," Oolong agreed laying back a foot feet away from him. "I sure am hungry…" Goku commented sitting down. "You're always hungry son…" Bardock said.

Unknowing to our heroes, they were being watched. A small blue cat-like creature was looking through a telescope. "Victims!" the cat announced happily. From a top of a tall stone hill the cat ran in. "Yamcha!" The cat shrieked to her master. "Lord Yamcha!" A young man with long black hair wearing a green dogi with kanji written on it; an orange scarf wrapped around his neck. Yamcha was in the middle of finishing his meal. "Lord Yamcha we have game. Victims!"

Yamcha smirked wiping his mouth with a napkin, "Well it's about time. " He chuckled evilly and smirked.

He got up and looked at the landscape outside the entrance to his lair. "We've had quite a dry spell since we've high jacked that caravan haven't we Puar. The floating cat known as Puar giggled, "Can you see you them Lord Yamcha?"

"Only three? No problem. Even if its 40 against me I can beat 'em all up!" Yamcha bragged. He sneered and walked inside his hideout.

IIIIII

Oolong rubbed his stomach, "Man I'm starving over here."

"I'm hungry too," said Goku.

"Make that three," Bardock grumbled spitting out his 20th piece of dried grass. He got up and turned around, "I'll go find us some food. There's bound to be something here, even in this dump."

"Do you like bacon Oolong?" Goku asked.

"Hells no! What are you brain-dead?" Oolong yelled at Goku.

"Relax it was just a j-" Bardock was interrupted his face serious. "Do you hear that?"

Oolong turned around, "It sounds like a-a motor."

Goku turned to his father's direction. Bardock clenched his fists at what he saw coming at them from the horizon. It was Yamcha and Puar coming towards the trio on their floating desert rider. Yamcha stopped in front of the three and got off his vehicle. "Greetings, I am Yamcha. I am master of the land you trespass upon." Puar jumped to his side, "It's my land too. I'm his parent Puar!"

"Hmph I don't see your names anywhere sop it can't be yours. Let me guess you are some lowly desert bandit," Bardock sneered.

Yamcha clenched the sword at his side hilt, "It'd be wise not to provoke my old man. I am more than capable of dispatching you myself!"

"Well, watch who you are calling old! I'm very youthful for my age!" Bardock growled. "I can crush you like a toothpick!"

Oolong immediately recognized Puar. "Feh…you needn't fear me. Just hand over all your money and capsules to me and I will let you all pass in peace." Yamcha demanded smoothly.

"Wait a minute you're Puar! We went to shape-shifting school together!" Oolong cried out.

"You know the cat?" Goku asked.

"Yeah crybaby Puar. I used to bully this guy for lunch money!"

Puar hissed, "I remember you! You were nothing but a loud-mouth bully. He always picked on me and stole my lunch money because I was smaller than him! Then he got kicked out of the academy for stealing the pretty female teachers' underwear!"

"Underwear Oolong…really," Bardock snorted.

Yamcha smirked, "I see the tables have turned my swine little friend. How does it feel to face someone bigger than yourself little piglet." Oolong hid behind Bardock. "This guy is bad news. Go beat him up Bardock!"

"Nah it's just of waste of my time and energy. Compared to me that boy is nothing but an ant." Bardock snorted. He sat down on a rock looking bored. "Kakarot why don't you take care of this loser."

"Okay dad but I'm really hungry…"

"Don't let hunger be your weakness."

Puar shrieked, "It's just like in the old days. The swine still hides behind somewhere bigger than him when he's afraid!"

Yamcha sneered, "Not much courage huh? I guess the old man's a coward as the pig; letting his own son take me on. Pathetic. "

Oolong gritted, "Puar you really gonna get it. My buddy Goku here is gonna beat you into your place!"

"Sounds like you haven't changed over the years Oolong…" Goku commented.

"Okay boys enough talk…either hand over your money and capsules or prepare to fight me." Yamcha threatened.

"Not interested…" Bardock said.

"Well I guess I'm in then!" Goku chirped. "I'm super strong.

Oolong pointed at Yamcha, "Alright big shot. My buddy Goku here is ready to kick your pretty boy ass. Be thankful it's only Goku. Bardock he would've annihilated you!" Oolong ran behind the rock where Bulma was napping. He grumbled, "At least someone's relaxed.

"Let's see" Yamcha challenged. Pull out his sword. And so...The battle begins!

_**TBC**_

**Author's note and corner:**

**Sydney: Okay so I cut this chapter short because it took up some much space and it was going to be too long. I am cutting in two half like the prologue. I'm just lazy!**

**Zepher: Yeah and you might've put this thing on hiatus if you hadn't had second thoughts.**

**Sydney: Well I'm busy with school and other stories and I'm planning on a huge One Piece DBZ crossover fic probably coming up if I think about it in 2010 or 2011 if I get to it! I have stories to finish and continue!**

**Zepher: No you too lazy.**

**Sydney: Yah I get it. Anyway no flames and rate and review are nice. I worked hard on this chapter!**


	9. Yamcha the Desert Bandit Pt2

I do not own any characters from Dragonball or Dragonball Z. They all belong to Akira Toriyama.

When we last saw our heroes, they had completely gotten lost in the middle of the desert without a mode of transportation or phone. That's when we meet Yamcha the desert bandit and Puar the shape-shifting cat. After intimidating the bandit our heroes are about to fight this wild wolf.

Yamcha pulled out his sword; "Prepare to die then," Oolong ran behind a pillar ruin where Bulma was napping under. Bardock was sitting on a rock not looking interested in the battle. It seemed he knew the outcome of the fight.

"Alight Kakarot, destroy this petty thief. No mercy!" Bardock said idly.

"Yes sir!" Goku grinned.

"Yeah remember kid, that sword ain't made out of rubber! He plans to kill us all!" Oolong shouted.

Goku cracked his knuckles, "I don't want to fight you, but if I have to defend my friends and dad so be it!" He gave an intimidating glare at the bandit.

"I admire you courage kid." Yamcha said.

_'His bravery or stupidity?' _Oolong thought doubtfully. He then heard snoring. Oolong turned and saw Bulma still snoozing. "Geez this broad can sleep."

Yamcha threw his sheath high into the air, diverting Goku's attention to it. While Goku was watching the sheath fly, Yamcha ran towards the boy and attempted to strike him with his sword. Goku leapt out of the way in time and kicked his back. Yamcha winced at the intense pain before Goku did a roundhouse kick knocking the bandit off his feet. With a flash the sword was knocked out of Yamcha's hand.

Goku leapt again and pulled out Nyoibo and shouted "Nyoibo extend!" and the staff hit Yamcha on the head. Bardock was impressed on the bandit's durability of those attacks. If the teen trained more than he'd probably be much stronger.

"Damnit that hurt! That pole you have…if that the legendary Nyoibo?" Yamcha asked getting back on his feet.

"Yeah my grandpa gave it to me," Goku nodded.

"How do you know of the staff?" Bardock asked

"I heard it belong to the legendary martial arts master named Son Gohan. Tell…this grandfather…was his name Gohan?" Yamcha asked.

"Yeah, Grandpa was Son Gohan, and he dies a long time ago. I'm his grandson," Goku replied.

Yamcha spat out some blood, "Feh, so Gohan had a son and his son had a son eh?"

Bardock shrugged, "Not really…The truth is-" But he was cut off by Yamcha. "I don't care about family ties. I can see that you both are strong. But I will have that infamous pole for myself!" Bardock rolled his eyes. Then the bandit got into a strange stance.

Goku just grabbed his stomach, "I'm hungry. I can't fight when I'm hungry…"

"Hah, you're about to enter in a new world of pain. Try my Wolf Fang Fist! "He rushed in an inhuman speed toward the distracted boy. It almost looked like he was running on all fours like a wolf attacking its prey. He charged at Goku and kicked him straight across the face. Then he did multiple strikes at the boy. It fazed him a bit and the tailed boy stumbled before getting his step back.

Yamcha stood back in awe, no one survived his special move "Hah…that kinda tickled…" the boy sneered, and it was almost out of character what he kid did. A small tickle down blood came down his cheek and a new expression was on the child. An expression of killing. Yamcha looked back at the supposed father, Bardock smirked and shrugged and waved at him goodbye.

Goku disappeared from human sighed and reappeared in front of Yamcha. He socked him right n the kisser. Yamcha stumbled back when a tooth popped out of his mouth. "My face…my beautiful face…" Yamcha murmured. With new found rage the bandit was charging like a train at Goku. Bardock got off from the rock he was sitting on and was about to jump in when a familiar feminine voice was heard.

"Hey what's with all the racket?" Bulma slurred rubbing her eyes. Yamcha saw her and stopped dead in his track. Something clicked he acted the a broken machine babbling like an idiot. For a moment the two shared eye contact until Yamcha rushed off to the jet rider. "Puar a-a withdrawal! We'll be back soon I won't forget this you bastards!" And with that they were gone.

Bulma blinked and then finally squealed, "Who was that cutie? Did you get his name, phone number, address, anything?

Everyone sighed and Bardock looked up, "I guess ignorance is bliss…"

"You got that right buddy…" Oolong groaned.

IIII

Back at Yamcha's hideout. Yamcha was sulking at his retreat and loss. "My lord, you must get over this phobia of yours" Puar said concerned slapping another band aid on.

"I know. But I'm just so scared of girls! I can't talk to them! I heard they read your mind once! Smell fear on you! Know your every move!" Yamcha rambled on.

Puar rolled her eyes. So now this new adversary has a known weakness…the female species. Can our heroes use this to their advantage. Stay in touch next time!

**Author's note and corner**

** Sydney: Well there you have the rest of "Yamcha the Desert Bandit". I hope you all are happy!**

** Zepher: I don't like Yamcha…**

** Sydney: Me neither but whatever he's part of the story. I rather have Vegeta pop out of nowhere and take Bulma far away and make sweet loving with her. *nose bleeds at thought***

** Zepher: I'm afraid of your dirty hentai mind.**

** Sydney: Meheheheh Yay hentai!** **Rate and review is nice!**


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